Reviews written by registered user
zaur-2

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33 reviews in total 
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1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
One of the funniest things I've ever seen....., 24 July 2008
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Not just a movie mind you, but one of the funnest "things" I've ever seen... And the other user comments and the discussion board only make it all the more gut busting funny... Guy is addicted to Internet Porn... and he lusts after his mother, his religious girlfriend, and a Senior Slut named Monica who has a sexy web site... ya ya ya voom.... And she even meets him at the soda shop and lets him touch her boobie, even though she has a bad ass boyfriend who kicks our hero's ass in the end after she bangs her head and blames it on him after he can't seal the deal with her. Then when the boyfriend goes to kick his ass she's all "no no baby..." Anybody else notice that Monica the slut was played by Nicole "Dicker"? I mean if there is such a thing, and what computer guy hasn't spent the long nights in front of the Internet, most Internet porn you're looking at stuff a long long way away, probably in another country, and this guy is lucky and actually has a willing slut not only in the same town, but the same HIGH SCHOOL!!! It would have been a much better movie if it would have been about Monica's Internet sex addiction, after all she's the one with a naughty website and not just looking at porn like our boy. I was actually hoping when she hit her head and that long line of blood spilled out that she'd die and that he'd get convicted for murdering her after becoming obsessed by her naughty website; would have made a much better movie than the self-baptism that occurs instead.

And Kelly Lynch wasn't so self-righteous when she was getting it from Patrick Swazi in Road House and showing her naked "porn" body. And she goes ape over our boy's porn when his brother is playing GTA and she says nothing. Anyhow, this movie is still a great laugh if you're a slacker like me with nothing better to do.

1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Most amazing scene, 28 October 2005
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This was an excellent film and the creepy hospital gave in an air of even more creepyness. The only thing I would have added was some creepy zombie like patients moving around as well. The Mr. Sandman at the end was totally freaky as well. Myres and Loomis of course come back again later despite being blown up. The William Shatner mask always gets me. It's so creepy and the lack of expression is always there. I keep waiting for him to say, "Hey... Spock.. I... am...here.. to... murder you" The best scene of all though would have to be the Pamela Susan Shoop in the hot tub. She has one of the most amazing racks that I've ever seen, and even before she dies we get a huge and dramatic view of them. A 10 for that scene alone.

5 out of 23 people found the following review useful:
yeah.... it's back, 12 May 2005
10/10

10 only because of Bonnie Bedila's assets on display. I caught this on the lifetime movie network earlier this week and it's 2005 and nothing has come to pass like predicted in this film. However, this movie does have 2 or should I say 4 redeeming qualities, mainly in the form of the mother and daughter. Bonnie Bedelia who plays the mom shows off her boobs in almost every scene and in a surprise in one scene you can see right into her nightshirt when she bends down and see full boobage. A real surprise for a TV. And it's a most impressive pair. The daughter is really hot too, although I'm sad to see her career has gone the daytime TV route and not the mainstream movie Ashley Judd nude scene or the playboy made cable TV route. Anyhow, watch this for the two hot women and just ignore the dumb story about how bad America is because of crap.

2 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
What happened????, 24 January 2005
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

OK... for the guy who didn't understand the three books... 3 illustrations from each book with the initials LCF, 3X3=9, the Nine gates. The ninth gate was the one he finds in the end. Which it goes from the bookstore to him going into a bright light... to see the devil?? I also wondered was the girl the devil the whole time and simply musing for it's entertainment with foolish mortals who wished to worship him/her. My theory is that she was the ninth gate... if you recall the ninth drawing is a woman and a beast. The significance of the end is he's going to be with her. She was totally hot.. btw. A perfect devil.

2 out of 7 people found the following review useful:
Holy Frak-this is excellent, 12 December 2003

This was great, I loved every minute. It's like the old show remade with all the junk left out. The old Starbuck was idiotic and goofy.(badly portrayed by that guy from the A-Team) The new Starbuck is awesome baby! The last scene with Starbuck with the cigar on the bed.. ouch woop woop de doo. And the the Asian girl as Boomer, wow, me likey likey. The new Cylons are awesome, wow, that woman is so much hotter than that Terminator woman. That was an awesome scene when they broke in to rescue Baltar. The old Baltar was goofy. Edward James Almos as Adama, awesome! Loren Green (Pa for Bonnaza) was never convencing as a space commander. And the President Mary McDonald, wow, I'm glad the other 43 ahead of her got iced by the cylons and she became the president. That leggy scene with her on the shuttle had me saying, Holy Frak! Richard Hatch and Randolf Mantooth can kiss my fulbalgraf, they're just jealous because that old series was so corny and bad.(half the sfx were used in that even cornier Buck Rodgers Series) Also, do some comparisons of photos to the women from this new Galactica and women form the old, the old gals look like total plain janes compared to the new women.

This is Scifi's Star Trek TNG.

"The Cape" (1996)
3 out of 30 people found the following review useful:
Adios bad TV, 12 December 2003

Corbin Bernsen made a comment himself digised as "The Cape" from KSC. This show is gone, it was a bad show that made a 90210 joke out of the US Space Program. Especially after the Columbia Tragedy, this show was more of an insult. Hey Corbin, stick to playing schister lawyers and dentists, you look like you belong in space about as much as Loren Green did in the old Battlestar Galatica. There's a reason why NASA doesn't recognize this show at all (even though they do recognize "I dream of geine" on their tour) that's because this show was bad. Really bad. William Shatner playing an astronaut would have been better. Na Na Na Na, Na Na Na Na, Hey Hey "The Cape" goodbye...

4 out of 7 people found the following review useful:
Deborah Shelton is awesome, 26 May 2003

I caught this on late night on Showtime or one of the Movie channels and low and behold to my shock and surprise there was totally hot Deborah Shelton, 1970 Miss USA, who used to be on Dallas, and Meline Griffith played her body double in the movie Body Double. Well, in this flick Deborah goes all the way. Her body is a perfect as I always imagined it would be, those many times fantisizing about her from Dallas and Body double. This flick is worth it for her scenes alone.

Laguna Heat (1987) (TV)
8 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
Mrs. Camdem---well I never, 9 May 2003

Catherine Hicks-- I don't even remember much what this film was about, but Catherine Hicks steamy scenes are worth the watch anyday. She's a total hotty, and you'll understand why her and preacher are always getting down and having more kids on 7th Heaven, and why Kirk had a bone for her (and her whales) in ST-The Voyage Home.

0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
I Wonder what happened to the 50s and 60s Woman, 11 April 2003

This was a cool show. Not only was Lynda Carter hot(she can lasso me anytime) but there were always all these hot babes around on this show. The way they dressed, the sexual inuendos.. the real Wonder of this show was how they got it passed the censors back in the G rated TV world of the 70s. But one thing always got me though.. what happened to the 50s and 60s, one season they're fighting the Nazi's and it's 1940 something, then all of a sudden they're fighting space aliens (these really cool Shalock things) in the 70s. I understand why Wonder Woman hasn't aged any, because she's a wonder.. but what about Steve??, did he get a little of that wonder juice and stay young too??

0 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
**Spoiler Warning** Man in the bushes, 8 April 2003

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I liked this movie in the beginning, Emily Warfield and Reese Witherspoon and the new guy had a cute innocent teen love triangle. Then all of a sudden out of the blue, there's an explicit sex scene between tractor guy and Emily in the bushes while on break from plowing. Nothing wrong with that Emily Warfield is really hot, and I'd like to see her in more stuff. However, after the loving, back to plowing, uh-oh, I left my hat on the bush, plow boy reaches for it, falls off the tractor, oh no the disk blades, chop chop. It's supposed to be tragic but it had me rolling. This ending is just about as bad as the Robbie Benson's come uppance in Ice Castles. Why they have to have these things, out of the blue, or out of the bushes in this case I have yet to see.


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