Reviews written by
motown_23 (jewbo23@aol.com)

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68 reviews in total 
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CKY2K (2000) (V)
4 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
The best cky video yet., 26 November 2003
10/10

This is the video that introduced me into the cky phenomenon as it did many others. To this day with 4 cky videos out to date I would say that this is still the best of them. There is some really great footage here for all to enjoy. The trip to Iceland is one of the highlights especially.

The now infamous Ryan and Brandon hotel room stuff (if you've seen it you know exactly what I mean). The video has superb music throughout the best being that from the superb band cky. It also has some great skating from bam, hoofbite and Kerry Getz as well as others. The DVD has a whole load of extra footage that is well worth watching. Pick it up now to see Bam Ryan and Brandon before the jackass fame. Amazing video.

10/10

8 out of 12 people found the following review useful:
The knights look great, 24 November 2003

Two girls and a guy go on a trip and halfway there on the train one of the two girls jumps of the train and spends the night in an abandoned village. When she is found dead her two friends set out to find out what happened to her. They find out that she was killed by the knights of templar who were killed many years ago and were hanged. As they were left hanging, crows pecked out their eyes and so now many years later they return from the dead and hunt victims using sound to find them.

The film is oozing in atmosphere and is has some tense moments. Although a little slow paced it doesn't get to boring at all. The few gore effects that there are in the film are done ok but the best thing about it is the look of the knights. They look very much like the ringwraiths in the lord of the rings films. As the knights are riding on their horses they look very impressive. When off the horses they move at an incredibly slow rate and one thing I have to say is their hands look terrible. They are bony and don't seem to move at all. There are a few moments of nudity and that really helps with the slow pace. The directing is pretty tight with some great use of angles and lighting.

After seeing this the first part of four films I'm looking forward to seeing the next film in the series. The strong points of the film are defiantly the atmosphere and the very cool looking knights of the templar. The weaker points are the slow pace and the very abrupt ending on the train. Overall it's a very good film that is often wrongly put in the zombie subgenre as the nights come from the dead but I wouldn't really say they were zombies. Defiantly worth a check.

7/10.

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
Below average throughout., 9 October 2003
4/10

A bunch of looser marines are sent to a remote island to diffuse it of bombs. When there they start to uncover a Government cover up that took place many years ago. It all seems that many years ago aliens landed on the island and proceeded to kill everyone on the island or something like that. The government somehow or other covered the aliens and their ship in concrete. The find out to much and are left on the island to die. Xtro 3 is a pretty dull affair that remains below average throughout. The effects on the aliens are fair until we see them jerkily moving about the place. the acting isn't to great either and most of the characters are really annoying i ended up hating all of them and looking forward to their demise. The effects of the helicopter attack on the other hand looked really good but its hardly a saving factor. The plot has been done to death the new setting of an island did nothing to help things along. The strange guy they find is kind of funny at times with is dancing and his rambling. The ending was just terrible. Pretty much a below average sci-fi film with poor effects and a done to death plot.

4/10

CKY Documentary (2001) (V)
8 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
As it says on the box, 'for die hard fans only'., 9 October 2003
9/10

This is a great little add on for any die hard fans of the cky series like i am. it goes a little into the history of the whole cky movement and the band. It basically features alot of things the crew did in their earlier days dating well back into their childhood. the crew often come in to comment on the videos and some of it is really funny. As a fan its great to see them all young and cool to see what an improvement they have made from these early days. Anyone that isn't a big fan should probably stay away as it would just seem like someones home movies. All real fans should get it now.

9/10.

Leprechaun (1993)
The Leprechauns are attacking!, 7 August 2003
6/10

Now the Leprechaun films are never going to be held as classics of modern cinema. But as a fun little cheesy horror flick the first Leprechaun works quite well. Tory (played by Jennifer Aniston) and her father have, for some reason decided to spend the summer in a run down house in the middle of nowhere. Little do they know that ten years earlier some guy had trapped a Leprechaun in the basement after stealing his gold. Then we meet three guys that are here to paint the house (by the way I love their company name ‘3 guys that paint' classic). one of them, the stupid Ozzie, sets the Leprechaun free. Then Ozzie and his child friend Alex find the gold the Leprechaun is still looking for and they hide it dreaming of riches. Of course then all hell breaks loose. Now I found the film kind of enjoyable. The acting is pretty good on the main part. Jennifer Aniston may be embarrassed of this film now I'm sure, but she didn't seem as if she minded that much back then (probably just needed the money). All the characters are pretty likeable. The stupid but funny Ozzie, The cool and smart little kid Alex and the hero Nathan. Of course Warwick Davis is superb as the Leprechaun even though he does have some really terrible bad lines. There isn't much in the way of gore. Infact the little guy doesn't really kill that many people at all. That's a bit of a downer. We do get to see the Leprechaun take a bit of a beating with a cut off hand and a stick in his eye but its not enough really. So on the whole and ok film that has its good point and its bad ones. For instance what's that scene all about where they throw shoes at him and he is running all over the place cleaning them? I get that he was a shoe maker but is he really all that bothered if they are a bit dirty? I liked the bit with our little friend on his tricycle and the Lucky Charms reference was kind of cool. The direction was ok a few nice use of angles but pretty basic on the whole. If your a fan of cheesy movies check it out but I think its going to be one you either like or hate and me, I liked it.

6/10

5 out of 7 people found the following review useful:
Still OK but could do better., 7 August 2003
5/10

The Leprechaun is back only this time its a different one even though this isn't really explained but it must be a different one because the film starts 1000 years ago. It's the Leprechaun's 1000th birthday and as we all know (of course we do) a Leprechaun gets to pick himself a bride every 1000 years (hmmm are they making up legends here?). So the little guy promises his slave that he will set him free after he has his bride. Little does the slave know the Leprechaun choice of bride is none other than his daughter. All the Leprechaun needs to do is get her to sneeze three times, and he does this. The slave then runs off gets killed and the Leprechaun says he ruined his chance. Now I don't get this bit. He got her to sneeze three times so why then wasn't she his wife? All the slave did was run away, how did that stop him marrying his daughter? But anyway, we cut o 1000 years later and low and behold that's today. It's the Leprechaun's birthday again and he has his eyes on a new bride. This films seems to completely disregard the first film as some of the rules have completely changed. For instance in the first film it was a four leaved clover that killed the little guy, in this one its iron. But in the first film he came out of the safe in the shop just before he killed the guy with a pogo stick. In this one they put him in a safe to try and kill him, what's going on there? There are some really good scenes in this film that I liked a lot. Seeing the Leprechaun getting drunk was great. All the little people egging him on was superb. Some of the acting was terrible though. most noticeably by the girl that played Bridget. The guys that played Cody and Morty were OK and Morty was a great character, and of course Warwick was great as the Leprechaun despite his constant terrible rhyming. There was a bit more gore in this one but not really enough for the sort of film it is. Low budget horrors like this need gore if you ask me. The directing was ok with some strange shaky angles and the whole cave place where the Leprechaun lived looked pretty good. On the whole it probably wasn't as good as the first but was still an enjoyable little B movie.

6/10

3 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
Major improvement on the first., 12 January 2003
7/10

In this one Karl the butcher Jr. is the killer. His mother (I think it is his mother) gets him to kill anyone and everyone probably seeking revenge for his fathers death. I'm not too sure as this is in German language with no subtitles so I'm not really to sure of the story line, not that it matters too much. Karl has a great look with his cool medieval knight style mask and army fatigue outfit. In my opinion if Karl was in a bigger budget movie he could have easily been up there with the horror greats like Freddy and Jason. It looks like this has been filmed with the same home camcorder as the first film. But this is a definite improvement on the first in every sense. There are no real boring parts of the movie apart from the talking at the beginning but that is because I don't understand a word of it. The first scene in the film is a little confusing with the drug deal. It starts off as if this is going to be a big part of the plot but everyone involved in the kung fu fight just ends up getting slaughtered by Karl. Most reviews I have seen of this say that it isn't as violent as the first. What are they thinking? Did they see the same two films as me? This one not only has more gore, it also has much better gore. We get heads cut off, a guy getting a hook in his penis and dragged along, a guy punching a guy through the neck, a girl getting her most private of parts stapled to bits with a staple gun the same staple gun is used for Karl to do some homemade surgery on his face. Another girl has her arms and legs cut off then her head cut in half with a spade just below the nose. There is a cool scene in a cinema with Karl shooting the place up. Then for a few minutes the film turns into a porno with a girl rubbing herself in lotion on a sun bed. This includes some very close up shots of all her glory. She then goes for a bath and is killed by our hero Karl. The whole scene seems completely pointless and the only reason for it being there is to show a girl naked. And I say that's a pretty good reason for it. Another cool scene is where Karl throws a rope with razor blades on it over a girls head and pulls it off. He then gets a blowjob from the severed head. Another kind of confusing part is where Karl is made to go down on his mother. I'm guessing this is just to show that they are a messed up little family though this was pretty obvious anyway. This leads me to the strange ending. There seems no point to it but this may again be the language barrier again. This film is basically gore for gores sake and in my book there is nothing wrong with that. Karl is now my favorite horror villain. He kills in anyway he can (even with a ruler) and doesn't care who it is he is killing.

7/10

Madman (1982)
2 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Above average slasher fun., 8 January 2003
7/10

Madman

It's the last night of summer camp and everyone is round the campfire telling scary stories and singing stupid songs as the guy TP does. Then the story of Madman Marz is told. The legend goes he killed his wife and his son and then went into the pub for a beer. Well the people of the town soon found out and decided to hang the guy in the forest. They leave our buddy Madman for dead but when they returned in the morning the body was gone. Its said he still roams the woods at night and if you say his name above a whisper he will come for you. Well after the story is told, the usual wise guy kid stands up and screams the Madman's name and guess what? He comes for them of course.

Madman is just another slasher movie, but it is an above average one. Infact I enjoyed it a lot. For the first half hour it is a little boring with not much but some really tacky songs and a very hard to watch love scene. The guy TP and the girl who's name I can't remember in a hot tub spinning around to a terrible song. Oh and I forgot the horrible undressing scene before that. So anyway when things finally get going it starts to show its self as a rather good slasher. It has all the slasher cliches. A killers point of view shot. Killer almost getting the person but at the last second they move. An axe kill and so on. Some of the kills are more original. Like for example the classic `head under the car hood' scene. the hanging scene is also very well done and its a surprise to see the guy that is hung killed of so fast. There are also some pretty suspenseful scenes, for example the scene with the girl running away from the Madman and hiding in the refrigerator.

So overall it is a pretty above average slasher with some good gore and some good suspenseful moments. It isn't short of its cheesy moments but then that's always a plus point in a slasher isn't is? As for the DVD it's an Anchor Bay release and it has a nice transfer with the film showing just a little bit of age. The main extra is a commentary with writer/director Joe Giannone, writer/producer Gary Sales and stars Tony Fish and Paul Ehlers. It's a good commentary with a lot of facts and information. There are also some TV spots and a theatrical trailer to round things off.

7/10

6 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
Voilent., 8 November 2002
5/10



This is a bit of a tough one to review as my copy is only in German. From what I can tell it starts of with a very boring scene while the start credits (some of the worst credits in history) are rolling. The scene is just some kid playing with a ball in some really rubbish effect of video, one of many rubbish effects throughout the whole film. Now from what I can gather this little kid is Karl, soon to become Karl the butcher. Karl seems to have been abused buy his mother and now go forward twenty years and Karl seems to live in the forest for no reason at all. Anyone that happens to come into the forest gets killed, usually in a nice Grossome way. Some of the scenes are mind numbingly dull and the only reason I can think of for them being in there is to put the running time up. For example there is a couple of scenes where a car is just driving along a road for like 6 minutes. Its beyond boring. The editing is also terrible . The music isn't to bad in-between scenes it just stops rather than fades out. The whole film is obviously just filmed on a home video camera and the actors are probably just the directors friends and family. So the acting isn't of the best quality. But to tell the truth there is only one reason for this film right? The gore. now for the obvious lack of money some of the gore scenes are rather well done. There are guys chainsawed in Half, heads cut off then cut in half and a truly disgusting scene where a woman is torn apart from her most private of parts. As a film maker about to embark on his firs home made film, this was great to watch as I'm sure I could do better. Maybe not with the gore but I know I won't be having any overly long and dull car journey scenes. So in all I would say that this film is only really worth it for the gore. You might want to fast forward the rest of it. Oh and what the hell was up with that ending?

5/10

1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
`Hey Grady do you ever remember your dreams?' "Only the wet ones", 3 November 2002
6/10

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge

Jesse has just moved to Elm street into the same house Nancy lived in and suffered at the hands of Freddy Krueger and yes its all happening again. This time Freddy is trying to posses Jesse so that he can kill in the real world. Only Jesse's girlfriend can save him now. I remember the first time I ever saw this film, I saw the first few minutes up to where Jesse's little sister puts the fingernails on from the cereal box, and was told by my mum that that was the end. For about 3 years I thought that the second Nightmare film was only 5 minutes long. The very first scene is superb and remains one of my favorite Scenes in the whole Nightmare series. Thats the bit with the school bus balanced on the rock thing. I don't really see what relevance this has with the story line but I'm guessing its just to show that Freddy is back. One thing that id bother me with the film is all the gay references. For one I'm pretty sure that the guy that played Jesse is gay. he seems very camp. Other references include the coach and his S&M fetish, what's with that? And the fact that Ron Grady says that the coach like pretty boys like Jesse. Then there is the thing with the coach getting the old towel snaps from Freddy. That really is one messed up scene. Next comes the bedroom tidying scene. How pointless is that scene? I really do hate that scene. I mean the terrible 80's music, the terrible 80's shirt he has on. god that is one bad scene. One last thing on this subject, why does Jesse sweat so much? The acting from Jesse is pretty damn bad but in a horror film acting never really bothers me to much. A few other things that I didn't like about this film was that a few things seem left unexplained, or maybe its just me not getting it. Like for one, why is the house so hot all the time? Is his to show that Freddy is about? Or is it something to do with the boiler in the basement. And how does the heat blow up a bird? But on the plus side the film has its good points. Freddy remains just a bad guy in this movie. None of his corny one liners here although I don't actually mind them. I think Freddy works well as a plain bad guy and with a bit of a comedy element to him. There really aren't many deaths in this so don't to much gore. There is one pretty cool scene where Freddy pulls the skin of his head to show his brain. The scene is a little to dark though. The ending is defiantly a bad point. It builds up nicely with Lisa going into the place Freddy used to work, past those weird looking hell hounds. But then there isn't much of a fight and it just seems to end. So to sum things up the gay references, lack of gore, boring pointless scenes and bad acting bring the film down, but its not without its good points.

5/10


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