spiderman-3 Reviews

Black Samurai (1976)

SnoozeFest, but need to watch it for Jim Kelly!

[13 July 2000]

This movie is a forgettable karate flick starring the wonderful Jim Kelly. Every karate movie cliche is here, including midgets, and an evil white guy karate master (who doesn't know karate) with a vulture named "Voltan."

STANDOUT SCENE - Watch closely when the evil white guy sends his vulture to attack Kelly. Quote, "Voltan! Kill!!" (never mind that vultures are lazy creatures by nature who wouldn't even eat a dead deer if they had to cross the street to get it). Okay, now watch when Voltan lands on Jim Kelly -- Kelly's stunt-double is a white guy. A blonde white guy - they didn't even give the double a dark haired wig or anything.

Other standouts include Kelly's staff fight with a group of thugs, and his pre-final showdown with a Damon Wayans lookalike, where Kelly spouts Muhammad Ali like banter ("C'mon chump! C'mon sissy!")

A great movie if you can a) find it and b) stay awake through it!!

Abar (1977)

Great B-movie with horrible acting

[11 July 2000]

First off: potential viewers should note that the picture on the front of the In Your Face re-release (actual title: Abar, The First Black Superman) has NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MOVIE! The two people pictured on the front are NOT in the movie, and neither one of them is Abar.

Now that that's out of the way, this movie is so bad that it is not only entertaining, it's highly enjoyable. The premise is easy to follow, and the story has so many goofball turns in it (Dr. Kinkade develops a serum that makes rabbits bulletproof!! Little boy's dream sequence is also unforgettable!) that you can't help but have a good time taking it all in. Production values are really horrible, sound looping is obvious, and scenes often cut for no reason. Still, worth a look, especially if you're a die-hard fan of nonsensical B-movies. The only real problem with this one is the extremely tacked-on lackluster ending.