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The Final (2010)
This movie is friggin Amazing
I loved this film. There's just something about it. The direction was flawless, the writing was sharp, the production seemed to go off real well and everyone in the cast was top notch. For a film with such hardcore social commentary as this film had it was as good as it possibly could be.
I really loved all the characters even the mean characters were very entertaining. You don't see that much anymore. The one who stood out the most was Julin Jean who I actually wished had a bigger part than what she was given. However what she did with her part was still pretty damn good.
If you are thinking about renting this movie, don't... buy it. It's well worth having in your DVD library. I was a bit surprised too with it being an after dark horror fest movie. But like I said its so worth it.
King of the Lost World (2005)
I loved this movie
To be quite honest I just got in to Asylum recently and have been lucky enough to interview the director of this movie, Leigh Scott. The first movie I saw was, "Beast of Bray Road" and I really enjoyed that. It was cheesy and fun. So when I saw that they had done a King Kong type movie that mixed with The Lost World I got excited.
This movie had some really cool CGI F/X and knowing that the budget for this flick must have been extremely well it was pulled together quite nice. Now the only thing I had a problem was not enough of the giant ape. If it had more of that and less of the survival story than maybe just maybe it would have been a bit better.
But other than that one little flaw I must say it was really well done. Which is funny cause I hate all these negative reviews I've been reading about their flicks. To tell you the truth I'd rather watch an Asylum tie in than one of the glossy pieces of crap thats been out lately. King Kong was a waste of 3 hours plus of my time. It dragged on way too much. This movie barely drags on and it kept my attention the whole way through.
And lastly the Asylum picks the hottest and best actors and actresses around. Good job, Asylum... combining talent with good looks. A feat thats sometimes not even easy to pull off in Hollywood. All in all I recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys sitting back at home with your friends on a Friday night, eating popcorn, drinking beers, and having a good time. I know I'll be going to Blockbuster soon and renting some more. That, you can count on.
Unicorn? More like UniPorn!
This is the most revolting piece of cinematic trash. How dare Richard Taylor (if thats his real name) show his penis on camera and call it art. I've heard he is of the Troma type. Well he can stick it where Lloyd Kaufman don't shine. I had to shut this off after 5 minutes. If I wanted to see a man pull down his pants for 8 minutes or so I'd ask my dad. F U Biz Jack Flemco.... whatever you are.
It won't let me end it there so I'm gonna keep going on and on. Blah blah. Blah. Until it lets me finish it. What is wrong with this? It's still saying it needs 10 lines of text. Just end this please.
Goodness gracious. Anyway his short movie "My Bloody Valentine" was much better. Go check it out on You Tube please.
This should be done. Stop telling me it needs 10 more lines.
The Quick and the Dead (1995)
The Slow and the brain dead
Not even Evil Deads' Sam Raimi could help this pitiful excuse for a spaghetti Western. Sharon Stone comes back to seek revenge years after the death of her father. Gene Hackman seems to be the only one not going through the motions and actually giving us a decent performance. However the script written by Simon Moore is so incoherent and dull. The characters are characters you've seen in every revenge movie ever. But Sam is a bit to blame as well. Holes in heads big enough to see the person who put them there and people doing backflips after getting shot were just a few of the very unbelievable things in this movie. Sam should just stick to Spider-Man.
Tail Lights Fade (1999)
Good independent film
It would normally be scary to approach the director to sign your movie and them say, "You actually own it?" But suffice to say, yes I do... and more so I am proud to own it. I hate Breckin Meyer with a passion. He's not that great of an actor when he's a lead (look at Road Trip and Rat Race for examples) so when I saw
he was the lead in this movie I was scared. But I bought it anyway. And to tell you the truth its hilarious! It's written/directed by "Drawing Flies"' Malcolm Ingram. Matt Gissing co-wrote it. I liked "Drawing Flies" alot but not as much as I enjoy Tail Lights Fade. Tail Lights Fade had the dialogue of a Kevin Smith
movie (go figure, Malcolm is good friends with Kevin himself) but had its own original twist on it. The story at teams seemed kind of weak but that didn't stop it by being so damn entertaining. I reccomend this movie to anyone who enjoys
fun road trip type movies. Breckin is the lead but he ain't so bad in this one. That really suprised me. I will own the next Malcolm Ingram movie, you can bet on
Hey, Stop Stabbing Me! (2003)
Non Stop Hilarity
These guys are comedy kings! I love this movie to death. And I was scared with all the people saying it was good that maybe they just have the same type of
sense of humor that I might not have. But I was Dead Wrong! I thought it was
great! From start to finish it made me laugh and there was never a dull moment either. But pay no attention to the cover of the box, its not a scream parody. Its not a really a parody of anything at all its just a well round comedy. Can't wait to see their next DVD "Murder Made Easy" which might be coming out later this
year. So please find this movie and buy it. You won't regret it.
Big Helium Dog (1999)
One of the best Sketch Comedies around
I saw this movie at Vulgarthon 2002.
I have to say I can't agree with any of the negative reviews. It's too damn funny. It's a fun sketch comedy film about... well basically not much. The story goes off in to so many sketches it would be hard to describe all of them. Brian Lynch
should write for Saturday Night Live and bring the show back to being funny.
The movie's main star Matt Kawczynski is hilarious as Charlie. He does a great job! He has some of my favorite lines in the movie. Especially his pick up lines for women. Haha. It's great. I thought everybody deserves some kind of award
for their performances. Top Notch! I still quote that movie to this day. Hope one day Brian releases a DVD... it deserves one. If you get a chance somehow to
see this movie DON'T PASS IT UP! And don't listen to the stupid whiney dumb
reviews for it, its great!
Haggard: The Movie (2003)
Best indie comedy to come out lately
So I've been dying to see this movie since I had read about it on the Bam Margera web site. And so it finally comes out and I pre-order it. And it came a week early. Rock on! So here is my review... minor spoilers.
Ry (Ryan Dunn) has a pathetic love life. His girlfriend Glauren (Jenn Rivell) is dating some guy named Hellboy (Rake Yohn in an hilarious part) while Ry and her are on hiatus. And not to mention that she may be doing alot more than just that.
Enter Valo and Falcone (Bam Margera and Brandon DiCamillo) who want to see Ry pull himself out of this senseless funk he's been in. Valo's obsessed with trying to help Ry while Falcone is a little bit more obsessed with an Invention contest worthy of winning a mountain bike full of diamonds.
To tell you more wouldn't be cool. This movie is the best independent film out now. Directed, co-written, and edited by Bam Margera. With cameos by professional skateboarder Tony Hawk (Funny cameo but if you've seen the teaser you've basically seen his part).
CKY fans will have a blast with this movie. Anyone else if you hate skateboarding and hate CKY you better stay away. Just a warning. Parental Guidance should be suggested. Not for the youngins.
Puddle Cruiser (1996)
The best indie movie to not come out on DVD.
A friend of mine told me about Broken Lizard at my work before "Super Troopers" had come out. So I taped it off of Sundance Channel and I gotta say that I just love showing this film off to people. It's like a pride and joy. You could say a hardly seen gem. Check it out if it comes back on Sundance or I hope when "Club Dread" comes out they'll put this film out as well. They need to.
One of the most bracing films I've seen in a long while...
I will never look at Clowns the same way. It is simply disturbing yet for some reason it was filmed so well that I wasn't all put off by the whole movie. The characters were very dark yet just light enough to make me really enjoy them. This movie was an amazing film. If you only see this movie once then you probably won't see it enough. Bryan Johnson is also a very nice guy to meet and I can't wait to see anything else done by him.