Reviews written by registered user
glass_chameleon

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14 reviews in total 
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Excalibur (1981)
0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
A very bad, yet very entertaining movie, 30 December 1999

I have to admit I found this movie to be extremely silly, with terrible acting, ridiculous dialogue, no plot or continuity, and extreme overuse of stage fog and fake blood.

In spite of this...well, actually BECAUSE of this, I found this movie to be highly entertaining. It's unintentionally hilarious, what with the overacting and the bad script and the silly costumes and so on. (Why didn't MST3K ever do this movie?) Then there's the additional fun of picking out well-known people before they were well-known ("Whoa! Patrick Stewart has hair!"). And, to give the movie credit, the fight scenes are cool, and the Wagnerian soundtrack is very fitting. If you like cheesy movies, definately see this one. I loved it.

One last comment: This movie is supposed to be true to Sir Thomas Malory's "Le Morte D'Arthur". I've read that, and a good deal of Malory's sources that he plagerized, and this movie isn't close at all to these tales. True, it has some of the same elements, but then again, so does "Monty Python".

0 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
an action film that makes you go hmm...., 5 September 1999

I'm a big, big fan of Jackie Chan and like most people, I don't watch them to get any intellectual challenge whatsoever. And normally I don't pay attention to the plot, either, since usually there isn't any. However, this movie was extremely interesting to watch from a Caucasian American point of view because of its depiction of white America.

I remember that this movie looked like somebody watched a couple of 30's gangster movies, several westerns and "The Godfather" three or four times and decided that's what the US was like. It was very interesting -- and very eye opening -- to see how Caucasians and Americans were stereotyped! *All* of the white characters (that I remember) were extremely racist, going out of their way to torment Jackie and his grandfather, who were just trying to eke out a living in a harsh environment.

Usually we're used to seeing the "no speaka engleesh" Asian characters who are usually convenience store clerks or yakuza or math geniuses. It was very scary to see Americans shown only as rednecks or gangsters! Although unfortunately I think the racism is less of a stereotype and more of the truth.

Anyways, this is something to keep in mind while you're watching Jackie beat the crap out of his opponents!

2 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
so bad it was funny, 1 September 1999
2/10

This is one of those movies that are so bad you laugh at them. I remember watching this movie with a large group of people and we ended up making fun of it, MST3K style, because it was so bad. Terrible dialogue, stupid plot and laughable characters make this movie one to rent only if you're in the mood for a really really really bad movie.

9 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
absolutely brilliant, 28 August 1999
10/10

I saw this short as a part of the Spike and Mike Festival of Animation and it *completely* stole the show. Basically it's about two people -- who are obviously perfect for one another -- on the ultimate Blind Date from Hell, where things rapidly go from awkward to horrible to worse. I wish I dared to write down some of the absolutely hysterical dialogue, but that would be spoiling the fun for others. This is a brilliant, very twisted gem of a short film, and made me an instant fan of Don Hertzfeldt, the animator. See it and you'll become one too.

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
The strangest Disney film I have ever seen., 19 August 1999
6/10

You know, after watching this movie, I had to wonder what the brainstorming sessions were like at Disney while coming up with the idea for this film. Were all the cute books taken or something? I mean, there's nothing about the original novel that exactly screams Disney.

Both my eyebrows went up while watching this movie, and stayed up. I mean, I remember Frollo's song about Esmerelda and I couldn't believe they made hellfire and damnation into a *musical number*, for god's sake. And Esmerelda's number where she's singing to God was a little heavy for a kid's flick.

On the other hand, this is one of the wittiest Disney films I've ever seen.

All in all, the strangest film Disney has ever produced.

Dumbo (1941)
1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
A Disney classic that shows its age., 19 August 1999
7/10

This is a cute, poignant movie with a lot of memorable sequences and good songs. However, I have to agree that it's surprising that Disney got away with the whole Pink Elephant sequence, even if it WAS 1941. And the crows...I don't think I would quite call it racist, but definately stereotypical. It's very odd to watch this movie in current times. But all in all, a classic.

Once again proving the book is (almost) always better., 19 August 1999

The first time I saw this movie was waaaay back in second grade and all I really remember of it then was that it scared the heck out of me. I saw it again a couple of years ago and wasn't particularly impressed.

But then, on a whim I picked up the book this movie is based on and was blown away. The book is a million billion times better than the movie! Magical, mystical, lyrical and philosophical: it earned a special place on my bookshelf with the children's books I loved as a kid and still love as an adult, such as Peter Beagle's "The Last Unicorn", C.S. Lewis' Narnia books and Susan Cooper's "Dark is Rising" series.

So, put down the VCR remote and the Blockbuster rental card and go get the book instead. The movie is mediocre; the book is magical.

4 out of 20 people found the following review useful:
mind-numbingly annoying movie, 15 August 1999

Whose bright idea was it to make a sequel to the Walt Disney classic? (Not Disney, thankfully.) Snow White is now on an completely forgettable adventure with the seven "dwarfelles", all of whom are annoying. If your kids want to watch this, make sure you're somewhere else. Don't waste an hour of your life watching this drivel.

1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
I miss John, but Hal isn't bad, 10 August 1999

This is one of the funniest shows on TV, and one of my all-time favorites, up there with MST3K, Star Trek Next Generation and Space Ghost: Coast to Coast.

I never got to see the Greg Kinnear years but I loved John Henson as the host. Skunk Boy was the best and the reason I tuned into the show every day. I didn't expect to watch the show much after he left, but I was pleasantly surprised with his replacement, Hal Sparks. He's not John, but he's not bad, either.

The comedic style of the show has changed, but not in a bad way. John was sarcastic-funny but Hal is kind of dorky-funny...sort of like your cute, funny but slightly annoying cousin that you beat up on when you both were kids. All in all, I think E! made a good choice.

1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
cute movie, but not Oscar material, 10 August 1999
6/10

I thought this was a very sweet & cute movie with an original plot and good acting. With that being said, I have NO idea what they were smoking when they voted this movie Best Picture. It just was not that deep or great and the romance wasn't THAT electric. It's a good bit of fluff that you'd take a date to or rent for a sleepover with all your galfriends. But not Oscar material.


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