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Pirates of Ghost Island (2007)
The fact is...this movie really sucks
The comments already posted for this movie suggest enough to describe how bad this movie is. Getting through it was truly a test of endurance. If you must see it for whatever reason, I suggest turning it into a drinking game. One is called "Fact is". One character says it almost every time he speaks; by the 18th time I was wishing for his death. Another game is "I really wish we could go home right now," the favorite line (no less than 5 mentions) of the blonde girl in the red bikini. Now that you're good and drunk, take time to take in the dime store costumes, props, and effects: pirate costumes from the party store, tiki torches from the hardware store, cut off limbs shown by burying the severed part in the sand and then sprinkling red syrup on the "stump", etc. Just don't expect coherent acting, character development, or plot. I want my hour twenty back.
Very funny, and very accurate!
I had to read Twelfth Night in college, so I rented this from the university library and watched it while reading along with the actual play on my lap. It is dead on accurate (no cuts) and the play is very funny indeed. This is my favorite Shakespeare play, and I still remember this production of it 10 years later. Kenneth Branagh made Shakespeare look fun, and I actually laughed out loud at some points. I didn't really like Shakespeare before reading/seeing this production. (Romeo and Juliet and Julius Caesar are the wrong plays to subject to high school kids.) Since watching Twelfth Night, I have a new appreciation for the Bard and his other works. Kenneth Branagh did an excellent job with this one.
Confusing blend of tones
I don't know what to think about this movie. I mean, there is an absolutely harrowing scene where a girl is tied to a tree and then stabbed with a knife the killer ties to the end of the girl's own trombone; then maybe a few minutes later a ridiculous car chase takes place that ends with the dumb, comic relief cop of the movie jumping Dukes of Hazzard style over other cars to land in a swamp. The comic relief stuff did not work in this movie at all. Which was a shame, because the killer's attacks were scary (Mary Ann from Gilligan's Island is one of the victims, and she played it pretty well!). The movie switched from serious horror and police procedure to loopy, small town goofiness. It didn't make much sense. Andrew Prine as the deputy sheriff was good, though. Ben Johnson reminded me of Jackie Gleason in Smokey and the Bandit too much. All in all, I'd say check it out for some decent horror elements, just ignore some of the more irritating stuff. 5/10
Girls Nite Out (1982)
"You're all a bunch of whores!"
Great dialogue there coming from David Halbrook's character. Wait a minute, HAL Holbrook plays the security guard in this movie. I wonder how that happened? Actually, I found it very funny that in practically every scene Hal Holbrook is in he doesn't appear in the same shot with any other character, like he shot all his scenes in one day and they edited him in where needed. I gave this movie a 1. There is no suspense, the killings look stupid, there are no characters to care about, it's just a mess. Julia Montgomery looked better at the bottom of a pie in Revenge of the Nerds. They even put in an interrogation/flashback sequence to fill the audience in on events we witnessed just 20 MINUTES AGO. I fast forwarded through the last half hour just so I could find out who the killer was. . .What a waste of time. OK, the bear suit was cool.
Blind Spot (1947)
Pretty cool little thriller
Jeffrey Anders is a down-on-his luck mystery writer who drunkenly blunders into his publisher's office one day with an idea for a new story. He has concocted a story where a dead body is found inside a locked, bolted room. He also has a simple solution for the mystery. Unfortunately, later his publisher is found dead inside a locked, bolted room and Anders can't remember the solution he told when he was drunk! Of course, Jeffrey is the main suspect since he was the last one to see the guy alive. He starts seeking out people he may have told the solution to. Then, those people start turning up dead as well. I liked this movie a lot. The suspects are pretty easy to narrow down once the love interest is cleared (she was the receptionist for the dead publisher and he always put the moves on her), but there's enough to keep your interest for 70 minutes and the acting is pretty good. Worth seeking out.
One word. Describes everything. So does boring, stupid, and ridiculous. I can't believe John Huston was involved in this. I can't believe Starsky was involved in this, I guess he was looking for work when the show ended. Of course, he did go on to direct Kazaam, which also was boring, stupid, and ridiculous. I want the 90+ minutes spent watching this back. I rented this because the cover art and back synopsis looked interesting. Trust me, its not.
Guy Ritchie did a fantastic job of weaving a tight story and good stunts into just under 7 minutes. The editing, music (particularly the use of Blur's Song 2 and Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries), driving, and Clive Owen and Madonna's performances are stellar. And the very last scene will have you laughing for several minutes. Watch it once for content, then turn the director's commentary on again for some other insights from Guy Ritchie.
Best in Show (2000)
I enjoyed every minute of this film. I am still replaying some subtler moments in my head and I laugh out loud just thinking about them. Check out Eugene Levy's mailbox the first time they show his house. If you get the DVD, check out the extra scenes where Harlan shows his beach ball collection and the two gay fellows embarrass a fellow dog show participant ("Pair of Queens! I guess we win!") Everything in this movie was played so straight forward and funny, but I will admit it will take a patient and appreciative viewer to get the jokes. My girlfriend hated it! Me, 10 out of 10.
P.S. Yes, the nut thing was very funny. "Now, Harlan, you jest stop naming nuts!" Killed me.
Mission: Improbable (2000)
This mission just got a hell of a lot more impossible!!
This is the best thing Tom Cruise has ever done in my opinion (OK, Magnolia was pretty good too, but I digress). This short film has had me laughing every time I think of it. Ben Stiller is great and Tom Cruise plays off him very well. Even John Woo gets some good lines in as well. I hated MI2 but since I heard this is on there as an extra I've rethought buying it for myself. Believe me, this thing is hilarious.
Soooo slow, but intriguing
I'm mixed about this movie. First of all, the tempo of the film is very slow and Bruce Willis acts through the whole film like he's hungover or something. On the flipside, Samuel Jackson was good as always, and the direction was very cool. I liked how shots were framed in mirrors, reflections in glass, between train seats, etc. That stuff was cool to watch. And speaking of watch, I looked at mine a lot during this movie. It took until the "orange suit man" scene to wake myself up. By then, the movie had 15 minutes left out of 2+ hours! And I guessed the ending, too (bummer, since Sixth Sense floored me). So, all in all, I gave it a 6 just for the direction and basic concept alone. Just be prepared to wait over an hour for everything to come together.