Reviews written by registered user
helpless_dancer

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1239 reviews in total 
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2 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Rebel with a cause: but he gave it up, 21 February 2005
8/10

Very enjoyable film about a southerner who gleefully goes off to battle only to find it wasn't the grand adventure he had envisioned. Sick of the carnage he takes the long road home, experiencing many rough knocks as he does. The picture bounces back and forth from 1861 to 1863 showing us the man before and after his soldiering experience. Primarily we see his relationship with a woman as it gets a rocky start and gradually forms into something permanent. Many fine performances in the movie made it memorable; I particularly liked the interplay between Ruby and Ada. I had to laugh a couple of times at Ruby's habit of counting off points she wanted to make. Hilarious. Well played out ending; fit in well with the mood preceding it.

1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Nothing new, but I loved it, 21 February 2005
7/10

As usual in these romance embedded comedies I wiped many happy tears as the lovable couple made their way towards a lovably enthusiastic display of eternally intense affection. Besides which, it had a message for us all: 'don't be a nasty person'. While I wasn't bowled over like I was in "Sleepless in Seattle" and "My Best Friend's Wedding", and I just knew what was going to happen, I nevertheless had a fine time kicked back and letting the action play out in it's own way. No getting mad at Tom Tom for being an arrogant little snot, no hand wringing worrying if the cutesy little couple would ever manage to beat the odds and form a lasting union which would burn brightly for eternity. None of that because, let's face it, one doesn't turn 30 over night and get to live all the mistakes over and right them. Fun film and JG is, like, totally hot you know.

3 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
The producers of this horse dung should be incarcerated, 20 February 2005
3/10

Yes, I've seen worse films but this was so bad they had trouble keeping horses during the shooting; the critters would all run off at night. To say Joe Willie's talents lay elsewhere would be the understatement of the decade. His dismal performance wasn't all that noticeable, however, because everybody else stunk like a week old corpse in a broken icebox during a Texas heat wave. Even Elam, one of my all time faves, couldn't keep a straight face in many of his scenes. There was so much ham in this turkey that if Jimmy Dean bought it he would have to open up a new building to process all the pork. Seldom have I seen a greater collection of grinning jackasses than were displayed in this thinly plotted venture. The soundtrack was interesting but all that rock music never quite dovetailed with the action on the screen.

5 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
Boy almost doesn't meet girl, 5 February 2005
7/10

Spiffy little romance/comedy which didn't follow in the footsteps of most in this genre. Perfectly paced with nice doses of nifty dialogue, a plethora of all sorts of characters, and a pair of leading players who came off as real people with the same needs as all of us. The leading lady was torn between her need for a mate and her distaste for all the hubbub that such a search entails. The leading man didn't appear to need a mate as much as he needed to shuck his routine job in favor of the more interesting marine biologist. This, at times, paled in comparison to his money problems and having to deal with a shady character and his muscle bound crony lurking menacingly just behind. Good film, and you'll love that aquarium.

4 out of 16 people found the following review useful:
IL' cross eyes does it again.....fails, that is, 2 February 2005
5/10

Another bland concoction featuring the boozy, down-on-his-luck *read:lazy* Tony Rome. While not as goofy, just almost, as "Tony Rome", I still enjoyed the cornball humor and tough guy action especially from Dan Blockbuster as he waltzed through his big and bad bit. Had to snort at the unseen nod to "Bonanza", somehow I knew that would pop up. Maybe Lorne Green should have been the lead instead of Snotra, eh? The only bright spot in this gibberish was the sensational Lanie Kazan and her go-go dancing self. Even an 'in her heyday' Raquel couldn't hold a candle to this voluptuous doll. OK, she could too hold a candle but it didn't shine with the fervor of Kazan's. Actually, the better title for this turkey would have been "Lady in Concrete" since cement is the wet form of concrete. Or, how about "Concrete Blonde"?

1 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Money as God makes for an empty life, 2 February 2005
8/10

Excellent drama centering around the workings of a money laundering outlet posing as a pawn shop. The pawnbroker is a heartless, money loving sort who insists that the only thing worth having is more and more filthy lucre no matter the cost. As a parade of pathetic thieves and losers flow through his establishment daily he has no more feeling for them than a bug on the wall; they are simply another source of revenue. He does get a 'religion' of sorts when he discovers the point of origin of much of the money he is laundering because of his experiences during World War 2. Not that this turn in his thoughts leads him to become a less obnoxious person. I liked the shop the story takes place in; smacked of the genuine article. I wasn't aware that nudity was this overt in film as early as '64.

Open Range (2003)
1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Mr. Dillon weren't never this good with a revolver, 22 January 2005
8/10

Much better than I expected. Costner was superb as the slow talking, quick handed gunslinger/raw-hider who has a low threshold for bull crap from a loud mouth, arrogant little pasture Hitler intent on keeping the open range open strictly to HIS bovine. When things reach a boiling point in an ongoing battle of words and nasty deeds the range becomes a place of gun-smoke and flying lead. I consider the shootout one of the best I've ever seen in a western - sorta the old west version of "Heat". Very realistic looking as this went down much like I would expect the real deal to play out. I especially appreciated the townsfolk getting a spine and chasing some of the thugs down and applying a little shotgun surgery. And that romantic ending.......lovely

Clerks (1994)
37 out of 60 people found the following review useful:
I've always wanted to be the assistant manager of a convenience store, 20 January 2005
8/10

Funny, fast paced story of an assortment of pathetic losers, their dreams, girlfriends, and go nowhere lives. I laughed all the way through at the give and take between the two lead characters and their stupid friends and lovers. Both intelligent, sometimes even sagely; the two men lead lives of loneliness and boredom leading to a careless attitude about their jobs which, in time, will become their position on all things unless they choose to reverse the course they are following. I was groaning with glee as the store clerk had it out with his lady friend over how many men she had fellatio with. I liked the way the film was broken up into titled parts, each comprising a small story within the tale. Zany, well worth the price of entry.

16 out of 16 people found the following review useful:
The code of the west wasn't always as it appeared, 23 November 2004

Entertaining and interesting: revisionist in many ways as it shows what really happened as compared to what we have been told occurred through books and film. The hosts introduce various characters such as quick draw artists or bull whip masters and allow them to demonstrate their respective arts of the old west. Throughout are commentaries by a group of western historians and students who give their take on the 'technologies' and events of historical record. The series started off with Keith Carradine as the host, but he was superseded by his brother David. Both bring their own personality to the screen with Keith being more on the serious side, while David engages the viewer with a comedic style, occasionally making comments to someone off camera. Very informative series for anyone interested in America's past.

0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Not the best RC ever made, 22 November 2004
7/10

"Notting Hill", "My Best Friends Wedding", and "Sleepless in Seattle" is what this comedy wants to be but can't. Whereas I didn't yawn all the way through, I never did get on the 'love' bandwagon and have a joyous, romantic journey. I believe the opposite sexes can and do act in this fashion, but to have it play out in such a perfect setting with these two 'professional' lovers was a bit overdone. The dialogue was sometimes corny beyond description, and all the scenes where the girl tries to lead the guy got to be a little tedious. Nothing against the performances, they were fine: I merely felt the writers were reaching to far for a tale of unrequited commitment against seemingly overwhelming odds. Besides, I knew 5 minutes into the film exactly what the outcome would be.....and it was.


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