The Orville (TV Series)

Old Wounds (2017)

J. Lee: Lt. John LaMarr

Photos 

Quotes 

• John LaMarr : Hey, what's up?

  Gordon Malloy : Hey, man, come on in.

  John LaMarr : Figured I'd introduce myself since we're gonna be working full shifts together.

  Gordon Malloy : Translation, you want to make sure I'm not a jerk.

  John LaMarr : Something like that.

  Gordon Malloy : Dude, I'm such a jerk, it's ridiculous.

  John LaMarr : Okay, well so am I, so this is gonna work out great.

• John LaMarr : So, I heard you've been out of commission for a minute.

  Gordon Malloy : Well, not out of commission, but, uh, definitely kept on desk duty.

  John LaMarr : Well, what'd you do? I mean, your piloting skills are kind of legendary. How'd you get suspended?

  Gordon Malloy : I let my cousin shoot a porno in the back of a shuttle in exchange for some pills.

  John LaMarr : W-wait. No. R-really?

  Gordon Malloy : [laughs]  Man, look at your face. No, no, no. I did a... I did a manual override on a tricky shuttle docking and sheared off a cargo bay door. Yeah, nobody was hurt, but 300 crates of authentic autumn squash were sucked into space.

  John LaMarr : Well, that's a lot of damn squash.

  Gordon Malloy : Yeah. I was trying to impress a girl.

• Isaac : [the Orville is under attack]  Deflectors at half power.

  Gordon Malloy : Sir, I think I can buy us some time 'till we can get the landing party back. Let me wing it here?

  Bortus : Proceed.

  Gordon Malloy : This is something I call "hugging the donkey".

  John LaMarr : You can hug the donkey?

  Gordon Malloy : Dude, I've been hugging the donkey since flight school.

• Isaac : The captain does not appear to be pleased at the arrival of his first officer. Why is this?

  Gordon Malloy : 'Cause she's a total bitch.

  Alara Kitan : Do you know her?

  Gordon Malloy : Oh, yeah. They were married.

  Alara Kitan : No way.

  Gordon Malloy : She cheated on him.

  John LaMarr : Aw, damn, that's cold.

  Gordon Malloy : Yeah, so this should be a really fun trip for all of us.

  Isaac : Your description of the occurrence indicates unpleasantness, yet you believe it will be fun.

  Gordon Malloy : I was being sarcastic. It's gonna suck.

  Isaac : Suck?

  Gordon Malloy : Yeah, suck. You know, like, ass, balls.

  Alara Kitan : What he means is if you don't already drink, you should probably start.

• Ed Mercer : Dr. Aronov, this is Captain Ed Mercer. We're about to start sending down your supplies.

  Dr. Aronov : Actually, Captain, we... we don't need any supplies.

  Ed Mercer : I... I don't understand. You requested these supplies yourself, yeah?

  Dr. Aronov : I did. I'm sorry. I... I wouldn't have lied unless I had to. Please, come down to the surface. I will explain everything.

  Kelly Grayson : [the transmission ends]  This is really strange.

  Ed Mercer : Yeah, it's a great way to start things off. Bortus, you have the conn. Lieutenant, you're with us.

  John LaMarr : [Ed, Kelly, and Alara leave]  Did you see that dog in the background licking his balls?

  Gordon Malloy : First thing I saw.

• Ed Mercer : All right, Commander. You have it.

  Krill Captain : Excellent. Now, give me the activation code.

  Ed Mercer : The code is six, alpha, nine, three, seven, alpha, three, zero, zero. Happy Arbor Day.

  [when the device is activated, the Krill ship is destroyed by a growing redwood] 

  Gordon Malloy : Wait. What's Arbor Day?

  Ed Mercer : It's the holiday where you plant the trees.

  John LaMarr : I wouldn't have gotten that.

  Gordon Malloy : Oh, yeah. No, I didn't get that, either.