Almost Human (2013–2014)
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Simon Says 

Det. Kennex and Dorian investigate Simon, a psychopathic killer who is strapping bombs to his victims' neck and broadcasting their final moments over the internet. Meanwhile, a power ... See full summary »



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Episode cast overview, first billed only:
Ramon Medina
MX (voice)
Joe Costa ...
Mr. Hartman


Det. Kennex and Dorian investigate Simon, a psychopathic killer who is strapping bombs to his victims' neck and broadcasting their final moments over the internet. Meanwhile, a power deficiency affects Dorian's energy level, causing him to have unexpected outbursts. Written by Karlo Smajo

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis


Action | Crime | Drama | Sci-Fi


TV-14 | See all certifications »




Release Date:

6 January 2014 (USA)  »

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Aspect Ratio:

16:9 HD
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Did You Know?


Darknet depicted in this episode actually exists even today under the name of Shadow Web on the hidden .onion website.All sorts of morbid & monstrous online links are available on Shadow Web, even the so-called snuff movies much like those made by Simon. See more »


Detective John Kennex: [to Dorian] Hey, who's a happy toaster?
See more »


The Air That I Breathe
Written by Albert Hammond (uncredited) and Mike Hazlewood (uncredited)
Performed by The Hollies
See more »

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User Reviews

"Simon Says - Lose your Head!"
31 January 2014 | by (United States) – See all my reviews

This episode explores the seamy underbelly of the Future Internet - Also, Future Dating Sites and new, creative ways to remove unsightly appendages from people, namely their heads.

Today, all we need is a Program called Tor which gives us access to what it called "The Hidden Wiki" - A hidden area on the Net where you can find any service you wish for any amount - As long as it is in Bitcoin. In Almost Human, they have what is referred to as "Darknet", a similar area where people gather to do equally nefarious acts.

But a Solar Flare has created a day of Havoc in this future landscape: Power is Limited and in some places, it is out - And Maldonado has given Detective Paul (Michael Irby) the responsibility for doling out power to the Android partners. Kennex informs the gathered cops "No Worries, the Donut Machine still works, but it is all out of Chocolate Sprinkles".

When Paul responds to Kennex with an insult, Dorian walks up and punches him in the nose. Then he apologizes, it appears that when Dorian is not fully charged, his Personality subroutines suffer and he is unstable. He had punched Paul in the nose, because Paul had given the MX's charging Priority, and DRN has less than a half of a full charge, making him act all Futzy.

Meanwhile, a banker is driving home when accosted by a "Bum" in an alley trying to wash windows - He sprays the Banker in the face with Fentanyl, knocking him out. When the banker comes too, he has a bomb attached to his head, and he is being filmed for a real-time Darkweb site.

He is instructed to rob his own bank and then drive to another location, but while driving, Kennex and DRN stop him, but there is not enough time to diffuse the bomb, and with no choice but to let it explode, Kennex promises to find the man's killer, who appeared to have had no intention of giving his victim any chance at all of removing the Bomb.

The whole thing had been broadcast on Darkweb - It seems there are rooms of people who will willingly watch people have Head-Ectomies. But clues had been left behind, breadcrumbs to be followed - Just as Simon wanted.

Kennex and DRN with Stahl's help find the next probable target, a young woman who delivers flowers, who had made the grievous error of actually going on a date with "Simon" - She is saved with seconds on the timer. And she knows who "Simon" is, gives Kennex the info, but as expected, Simon is "not at home".

Apparently, Simon has a little higher priority target than just a mere flower-girl: He has selected Kennex.

He had left Kennex tied up to a park bench: NO Cops, NO Bomb Squads, Kennex is to get NO HELP at all.

But since when does Judge Dredd need any help? Fortunately, Kennex has Dorian, who even with 17% of a charge left, can still do some damage.

But the moral of the story is something we can use even today: Be careful with those Dating Websites, you never know what kinds of creeps are lurking.

Simon Himself has his own Sad Story. In his mind, he was never given a chance by these people who wronged him: The Banker who refused to give him a Loan, the Girl who left him alone at a Park Bench, and the POLICE DEPARTMENT who rejected his application as a Bomb Tech! So he is toting some serious baggage.

And even the Flower-Girl. She had her own sob-story, she delivers flowers all day long to people who are in love, and that's all she wanted, some romance of her own. Is a Dating Site the place to find it? Not if all you can attract are people like Simon.

Some people will go to Desperate Straits to find romance, and still others will remove your head with a Bomb.

Is it worth it?

3 of 5 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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