Andy: Which one are you? You need to tell Mr. P. you broke one of his beers.
Haley Dunphy: I'm Alex. Who are you?
Andy: I'm their manny.
Haley Dunphy: Nice try. I know their Manny and you look nothing like him.
Andy: Oh, you're Haley!
Andy: I hate to get all ballistic, but it has not been a pleasure meeting you.
Haley Dunphy: You kiss your imaginary girlfriend with that mouth?
Andy: Yes, I do. And she's not imaginary, she's real. She's a real girl.
Cameron Tucker: That was the worse call since Russell Crowe was cast on Le Miz!
Mitchell Pritchett: You know what you need?
Cameron Tucker: To gather my team and put the fear of God in them.
Mitchell Pritchett: I was going to say get a churro.
Cameron Tucker: I can do both!
Manny Delgado: Bakers get all the girls.
Jay Pritchett: Cooks get all the girls. Bakers are girls. Betty Crocker, Mrs. Fields, Little Debbie...
Manny Delgado: What about the Pillsbury Doughboy?
Gloria Delgado-Pritchett: Good one, Manny.
[Tickles Manny's belly, he giggles]