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*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Assassins Game is an action film starting Tom Sizemore, Vivica A. Fox
and Bai Ling amongst others. It concerns a a retired Hit-man called Vet
Jones (played by Mark Mikita) who is working as a janitor. He has to
perform one last job otherwise his son dies. This is because his son is
also a member of a gang of assassins that botched up an assignment at
the beginning of the movie. As the movie progresses it becomes apparent
that Vet Jones plans on saving both his son and their apparent target
so he is in fact the heroic Hit-man of this movie.
Bai Ling plays the bodyguard tasked with protecting the target played by Vivica A. Fox whom the main villain El Viejo (played by Tom Sizemore) wants taken out. He also suspects that Jones might try and double cross him so he sends his main henchman and other assassins after both the original targets and the squad he sent out in the first place. That's about it. There is not much of a plot or in-depth characters development. The story is not great or original and most of the actors are relative unknowns (other than the three main names mentioned above).
To be fair, the action is plentiful but ultimately not enough to carry the movie. It gets boring and repetitive after awhile. Sure, there is a lot of shooting, fighting, a large body count, and music pumping in the background but this does not make up for the things that this film lacks, mainly a decent story and good acting. Unfortunately Tom Sizemore who used to act in good movies can't save this film either. He looks menacing in the beginning but his gun waving routine gets repetitive quite quickly as well. Overall this movie should be avoided. There are better action flicks out there that one could spend time watching. A 2.5/10.
1-10, eh? Is a minus rating possible here?
I always try to keep an open mind when viewing a new film, even if going in I know it's going to be somewhere below the bottom of the barrel.
OK . . . I'll confess, my only motivation for even attempting to endure this trainwreck in the making was to watch Bai Ling do her thing.
I LOVE Bai Ling, she is such an unusually interesting character (and amazingly beautiful). Even if she is just running around blasting away with a giant machinegun . . . in stiletto heels . . . I mean really, how can anyone beat that???
As for the aforementioned trainwreck (oops, I meant film production), one would have to search far and wide, throughout the annals of film history to come up with anything that even remotely approaches this level of attempted filmcraft at its absolute worst.
Oh, but wait . . . there IS just such an example. For anyone who may be familiar, that unique distinction has, for decades, been the supreme domain of "Plan 9 from Outer Space". Yup, that has traditionally been the extreme milestone of filmcraft at its lowest possible ebb (and believe me, I've seen more than my share of contenders for this dubious distinction).
But, as is inevitable, even the lowest of the low must fall from their 15 femto seconds of infamy, and let the new contender take the title. And that fabulous moment of infamy goes to . . . (drum roll, please) . . .
So, get an adult beverage (or whatever your pleasure might be), gather a few comrades, and get ready for perhaps the most spectacular example of unintended comedy to violate a screen in recent memory.
As for Bai Ling . . .
You are beautiful, a rare joy and very fun to watch.
I don't know who talked you into this film fiasco (maybe you should be looking for a new agent . . . just sayin').
But no worries. You have had much better material in the past, and no doubt will in the future.
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