- Chris Traeger: How did he do?
- Tom Haverford: Andy finished his two-mile run in 29 minutes, 43 seconds.
- Andy Dwyer: No! I'm never going to be a cop... I'm going to have to be a robber.
- Tom Haverford: Hey man, what'd the doc say? Everything OK?
- Chris Traeger: The tests and blood work came back, and the news is terrible.
- [Andy gasps]
- Chris Traeger: They found... nothing.
- Tom Haverford: Nothing?
- Chris Traeger: Nothing: The silent killer.
- Andy Dwyer: Oh my God.
- Leslie Knope: Okay, anyone else?
- Pearl: Yeah. If we put a tax on soda, I mean, what's next, income?
- Leslie Knope: Sir, you don't pay your income tax?
- Pearl: Whether or not I pay income tax is none of the government's business.
- Leslie Knope: No... well... No, actually, it is.
- Pearl: Well, you don't know my name or what I look like, so good luck finding me!
- Terrence: I think we should tax all bad things. Like racism, and women's vaginas.
- Ann Perkins: We're not taxing anyone's genitals.
- Terrence: Then what the hell are we doing here? Come on, boys!
- [Terrence and several other men walk out]
- Leslie Knope: I don't understand. Why did you try to get me fired?
- Ron Swanson: The first year you worked here, you drove me nuts. I would say no to something you wanted to do, and you'd ignore me, or go over my head and do it anyway. You were insubordinate, stubborn, a pain in my ass, and worst of all, bubbly.