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1313: Billy the Kid (2012)

Not Rated | | Western | Video 1 June 2012
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In April 1881, wounded outlaw and fugitive Billy the Kid staggers into the desert town of Hell's Heart to rest and recuperate only to soon discover that voracious supernatural entities lurk in the town and want him from a trophy.

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Brandon Thornton ...
...
Whitecastle
...
Lottie
...
Buck
Ryan Curry ...
Lloyd
Ryan McIntyre ...
...
Uriel
Michael Hudson ...
Rabanne
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In April 1881, wounded outlaw and fugitive Billy the Kid staggers into the desert town of Hell's Heart to rest and recuperate only to soon discover that voracious supernatural entities lurk in the town and want him from a trophy.

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Western

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Not Rated
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1 June 2012 (USA)  »

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$1,000,000 (estimated)
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1.78 : 1
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A Veritable Cornucopia of Historic Inaccuracies
8 January 2013 | by (Lorton, Virginia) – See all my reviews

From the first moment of this film, in my head I heard the director thinking, "Hey, guys. Let's use a yellow filter (although I think s/he was really aiming for sepia-tone, which has more of a brownish tint) to give this flick a genu-wine old west feel. What do ya say?"

The guy walking through the desert (for 8 solid minutes without uttering a word or doing anything interesting whatsoever other than hold his left arm in a death grip) is clean. He is absolutely devoid of dust and any sign of sunburn. The desert is dry and dusty by nature and the sun is relentlessly beating down for hours, yet this man is filth free and not sunburned?

Why is he walking around wearing a vest (with historically inaccurate side-cinching ties) without a shirt on? In the read old west, he would have been considered inappropriately dressed as his nipples, belly button, and bare chest can be seen. Think of the women! What a scandal to cause a woman to swoon. The hat he is wearing looks like a child's costume hat. Lastly, black skinny jeans did not exist in 1881.

The whole walking through the desert scene could have been cut down to less than a minute and have achieved much the same effect.

Croatoan? Really?! What does a reference to the lost colony of Roanoke Island, VA have to do with anything?

There was no need to have the dream sequence of watching an Indian run through the woods and duck under tree branches for a solid minute.

Lottie should have her hair in a respectable updo. Respectable women in the 1880s did not wear their hair down in public or in front of strangers. The light fixture in Henry/Billy's boarding room at Lottie's is clearly a ceiling-mounted electric light. Tiled islands/bars were not standard in kitchens in the late 19th century. Modern door handles and closures can be seen on all of the doors. Henry would swelter if he were really wearing thermal long john pants.

A blacksmith would not likely be stupid enough to work shirtless. Flying embers, fire, and molten metal are dangerous. The more layers between his skin and the item he is working on, the better. Blacksmith aprons are very long covering most of the chest and legs and are always made of thick, protective leather; not a flimsy cloth thing that hangs low on the chest.

Seriously? Is every man in this movie shirtless or does the director just have a male nipple fetish?

So what's going on with the disembodied voice?

Okay, we get it. Henry/Billy is tied to his bed and cannot free himself. We don't need five minutes of film time to understand this concept.

Air conditioning/heating vents in the ceiling reveal that the house is modern as does the cast-concrete patio furniture, upholstered modern sofa outside, plastic flower pots, spice rack, cabinetry, bendable desk lamp, and the sliding glass doors/windows. To the left of the boarding house's front door, a burlap throw has been thrown over a flat screen TV on a media stand. How do I know? Easy. In a previous scene, someone neglected to conceal it. It looks like very little attempt to conceal modernity and/or stay true to the time period was made. Blame the low budget, but it's really hard for me, a History minor, to ignore all of the historical inaccuracies.

I'm pretty sure patent leather Doc Marten's did not exist in 1881, blacksmith dude.

Seriously, that's how it ends? Lame. What a waste of time.

This movie does have one redeeming quality: the guys playing Billy the Kid and the former sheriff are very attractive and physically fit.


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