Dwight Schrute: [yelling at Jim] I am making a citizen's arrest. You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to beg for mercy. You have the right to request judgment by combat. Dwight's rights.
Oscar Martinez: Don't you want to see the baby?
Dwight Schrute: Psh! Why? I know what Angela and the senator look like. I can mash that up in my head right now.
Dwight Schrute: That baby is a Schrute. And unless somebody taught Mose sex, that baby is mine.