Lord Varys: A thousand blades, taken from the hands of Aegon's fallen enemies. Forged in the fiery breath of Balerion the Dread.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: There aren't a thousand blades. There aren't even two hundred. I've counted.
Lord Varys: Heh. I'm sure you have. Ugly old thing.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: It has a certain appeal.
Lord Varys: The Lysa Arryn of chairs. Shame you had to settle for your second choice.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: Early days, my friend. It is flattering really, you feeling such dread at the prospect of me getting what I want.
Lord Varys: Thwarting you has never been my primary ambition, I promise you. Although, who doesn't like to see their friends fail now and then.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: You're so right. For instance, when I thwarted your plan to give Sansa Stark to the Tyrells, if I'm going to be honest, I did feel an unmistakable sense of enjoyment there. But your confidant, the one who fed you information about my plans, the one you swore to protect... you didn't bring her any enjoyment, and she didn't bring me any enjoyment. She was a bad investment on my part. Luckily, I have a friend who wanted to try something new. Something daring. And he was so grateful to me for providing this fresh experience.
Lord Varys: I did what I did for the good of the realm.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: The realm. Do you know what the realm is? It's the thousand blades of Aegon's enemies, a story we agree to tell each other over and over, until we forget that it's a lie.
Lord Varys: But what do we have left, once we abandon the lie? Chaos? A gaping pit waiting to swallow us all.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some, are given a chance to climb. They refuse, they cling to the realm or the gods or love. Illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is.
Ramsay Snow: If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention.
[Tyrion and Cersei are watching Sansa talking to Ser Loras]
Tyrion Lannister: I don't suppose there is anything we can do about this?
Cersei Lannister: We can have them both killed.
Tyrion Lannister: It's hard to say which of the four of us is getting the worst of the arrangement. Probably Sansa. Though Loras will certainly come to know a deep and singular misery.
Cersei Lannister: Father doesn't discriminate.
[Ramsay blows a horn to wake Theon up]
Ramsay Snow: [mockingly] Sorry! Were you sleeping?
Theon Greyjoy: Wa...
Ramsay Snow: Wa? Water? You must mean water. I wish I had some for you.
[Ramsay deliberately spills the water all over the floor. Theon groans in despair]
Ramsay Snow: Let's play a game! Which body part do you need the least?
Theon Greyjoy: [whimpers] Please...
Ramsay Snow: "Please" isn't a body part.
Theon Greyjoy: I'll tell you everything, please.
Ramsay Snow: But you already told me everything, remember? Your daddy was mean to you. The Starks didn't appreciate you. One can admit, the Stark boys. They're still alive. Wouldn't that be a hunt to remember. You failed, but I'm a better hunter than you. Now, how about your little finger? You don't need that for much do you? No? Good! Let's start with that. You've been wondering why you're here, how many, where you are, who I am, why I'm doing this to you. So, guess! If your right, I'll tell you, by the old gods and the new, I swear it. You win the game if you figure out who I am and why I'm torturing you, and I win the game if you beg me to cut off your finger.
Theon Greyjoy: If I win, you'll let me go?
Ramsay Snow: [chuckles nastily] If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention.
Theon Greyjoy: Please...
Ramsay Snow: [holds a knife close to Theon's face] You say "please" again, and you'll wish you hadn't. You first, where are we?
Theon Greyjoy: The North.
Ramsay Snow: Too vague!
Theon Greyjoy: Deepwood Motte.
Ramsay Snow: [laughs] Terrible guess! Now where?
Theon Greyjoy: Last Hearth.
Ramsay Snow: Now, do I look like a fucking Umber to you?
Theon Greyjoy: The Karhold!
Ramsay Snow: Karhold. How did you know that? Did you see any banners flying when we came in?
Theon Greyjoy: No... it was just a guess.
Ramsay Snow: Very good, Lord Theon. Who am I?
Theon Greyjoy: Torrhen Karstark.
Ramsay Snow: He's dead! Strangled by the Kingslayer.
Theon Greyjoy: He was your brother. your father is Rickard Karstark.
[Ramsay walks away]
Theon Greyjoy: You swore to tell me!
Ramsay Snow: You're right.
Theon Greyjoy: Lord Rickard Karstark is Robb's bannerman, and I betrayed Robb. that's why you're torturing me.
Ramsay Snow: Yes... you win.
[Ramsay pauses and runs up to Theon]
Ramsay Snow: You forgot to ask one question! You forgot to ask me if I'm a liar! I'm afraid, I am. Everything I told you is a lie. This isn't happening to you for a reason, well one reason: I enjoy it!
[Ramsay starts torturing him]
Theon Greyjoy: Please! Please cut it off, cut it off!
[Ramsay smiles at Theon]
Ramsay Snow: I win!
Melisandre: [to Gendry] You are more then they could ever be. They are just foot soldiers in the great war. You will make kings rise and fall.
[Anguy is helping Arya practice her archery; she lands an arrow square in the dummy's face]
Arya Stark: Joffrey.
[Arya pierces the dummy's heart with another arrow]
Arya Stark: Cersei.
[Arya strikes the dummy in the crotch with another arrow]
Arya Stark: Ilyn Payne.
Anguy: You're good. You're not as good as you think you are.
Arya Stark: Face, tits, balls. I hit him right where I wanted to.
Anguy: Aye, but you took your sweet time of it. You won't be fighting straw men, little lady. Show me your position.
[Arya draws another arrow]
Anguy: Keep your elbow high. You want your back doing the hard labor. You're holding. Never hold.
Arya Stark: What?
Anguy: Your muscles tense up when you hold. Pull the string back to the center of your chin, and release. Never hold.
Arya Stark: But I have to aim.
Anguy: [chuckles] Never aim.
Arya Stark: [doubtfully] Never aim?
Anguy: Your eye knows where it wants the arrow to go. Trust your eye.
Tywin Lannister: My stomach remains quite strong, however. The only thing that might turn it are details of your grandson's nocturnal activities. Do you deny them?
Olenna Tyrell: Oh no, not at all. A sword swallower through and through.
[while climbing the Wall]
Ygritte: Are you staring at me ass, Jon Snow?
Ramsay Snow: This isn't happening to you for a reason. Well, one reason: I enjoy it!
[as the men are taking away Gendry]
Beric Dondarrion: We serve the Lord of Light, and the Lord of Light needs this boy.
Arya Stark: Did the Lord of Light tell you that, or did she?
[one of the guards gives gold to Beric]
Arya Stark: You're not doing this for your god! You're doing this for gold!
Thoros of Myr: We're doing it for both, girl. We can't defend the people without weapons and horses and food, and we can't get weapons and horses and food, without gold.
[as Melisandre is about to mount her horse and leave, Arya stops her]
Arya Stark: You're a witch! You're going to hurt him!
[Melisadre turns to Arya. She grabs her chin and looks at her closely]
Melisandre: I see a darkness in you. And in that darkness, eyes staring back at me. Brown eyes, blue eyes, green eyes. Eyes you'll shut forever. We will meet again.
[Melisandre and her companions leave with Gendry. Arya is confused]
Olenna Tyrell: Impossible.
Tywin Lannister: Why?
Olenna Tyrell: My grandson is the pride of Highgarden. The most desirable bachelor in all seven kingdoms. Your daughter...
Tywin Lannister: Is rich, the most beautiful woman in all seven kingdoms, and the mother of the king.
Olenna Tyrell: Old.
Tywin Lannister: Old?
Olenna Tyrell: Old. I'm something of an expert on the subject.
Petyr 'Littlefinger' Baelish: Chaos isn't a pit, chaos is a ladder, many who try to climb it fail and never get to try again, the fall breaks them and some are given a chance to climb, but they refuse. They cling to the realm or the gods or love, illusions. Only the ladder is real. The climb is all there is.
Jojen Reed: I saw Jon Snow.
Bran Stark: You saw him? At Castle Black?
Jojen Reed: He was on the wrong side of the wall. He's surrounded by enemies.
[as Meera and Osha are arguing]
Bran Stark: You're both good at skinning rabbits.
Jon Snow: [Jon is staring up at the Wall] Have you ever climbed it before?
Ygritte: No. But Tormund's done it half a hundred times.
[Jon continues staring]
Ygritte: You're afraid.
Jon Snow: Aren't you?
Ygritte: Aye. Oh, it's a long way up and a long way down, but... I've waited my whole life to see the world from up there.
Ygritte: Here, sit down. Brought a pair for you.
[she tosses Jon a pair of crampons]
Ygritte: They're too big for you, but they're good.
Jon Snow: You kill someone for them?
Ygritte: Nah. I didn't kill him. But I bet his balls are still bruised.
Ygritte: He wasn't good to me the way you're good to me. Well, he didn't do that thing you do with your tongue.
Jon Snow: [lowering his voice nervously] Yeah, can we not talk about that here?
Ygritte: [playfully imitating him] "Can we not talk about that here? Oh, I'm Jon Snow. I've killed dead men and Qhorin Halfhand, but I'm scared of naked girls!"
Jon Snow: Did I seem scared the other day?
Ygritte: You were trembling like a leaf.
Jon Snow: Only in the beginning.
Ygritte: Only in the beginning. You're a proper lover, Jon Snow. And don't worry. Your secret's safe with me.
Jon Snow: What secret?
Ygritte: Do you think I'm as dumb as all those girls in silk dresses you knew growing up?
[Jon chuckles and starts tying on his crampons]
Ygritte: You're loyal. And you're brave. You didn't stop being a crow the day you walked into Mance Rayder's tent.
Ygritte: But I'm your woman now, Jon Snow. You're going to be loyal to your woman. The Night's Watch don't care if you live or die. Mance Rayder don't care if I live or die. We're just soldiers in their armies, and there's plenty more to carry on if we go down. But it's you and me that matters to me and you. Don't ever betray me.
[Jon hesitates, then looks at her]
Jon Snow: I won't.
Ygritte: Because I'll cut your pretty cock right off and wear it round me neck.
Tormund Giantsbane: Sink your metal deep, and make sure it holds before taking your next step. And if you fall, don't scream. You don't want that to be the last thing she remembers.
Sansa Stark: That's a wonderful pin.
Loras Tyrell: It's more of a brooch really.
[Loras thinks about it]
Loras Tyrell: Well, I suppose a brooch is a sort of pin, so...
Sansa Stark: Will they let me invite my family?
Shae: They didn't ask my opinion.
Sansa Stark: But do you think they will?
[Melisandre enters the Brotherhood's hideout unannounced]
Beric Dondarrion: Forgive my manners. I don't see many ladies these days.
Thoros of Myr: Lucky for the ladies.
[Melisandre walks over to Beric and examines his scars]
Melisandre: [to Thoros] How many times has the Lord brought him back?
Thoros of Myr: Six.
[Melisandre looks shocked]
Melisandre: [in High Valyrian] That's not possible.
Thoros of Myr: [in High Valyrian] The Lord has smiled upon me.
Melisandre: [in High Valyrian] You should not have this power.
Thoros of Myr: [in High Valyrian] I have no power. I ask the Lord for His favor, and He responds as He will.
[Thoros sits down by the fire]
Thoros of Myr: [in English] I've always been a terrible priest. Drank too much rum. Fucked all the whores in King's Landing. It's a terrible thing to say, but... by the time I came to Westeros, I didn't believe in our Lord. I decided that He, that all the gods, were stories we told the children to make them behave. So I wore the robes, and every now and then, I'd recite the prayers. It was just for show. A spectacle for the locals. Until the Mountain drove a lance through this one's heart.
[Thoros points at Beric]
Thoros of Myr: I knelt beside his cold body, and said the old words. Not because I believed in them, but... he was my friend. And he was dead. And they were the only words I knew. And for the first time in my life, the Lord replied. Beric's eyes opened. And I knew the truth: our God is the one true God... and all men must serve Him.
Melisandre: [to Beric] You've been to the other side?
Beric Dondarrion: The other side? There IS no other side. I have been to the darkness, my lady.
Beric Dondarrion: He sent you to us for a reason.
Melisandre: You have someone He needs.