- Tracy Jordan: The so-called idiot community will not be silenced.
- Liz Lemon: For God's sake, Tracy!
- Tracy Jordan: We are legion! We are America! Frat boys, DJs, loud-mouth old bitches, investment bankers, the tramp stamp, parrot heads, anti-vaccination crusaders, and people who won't shut up about scuba diving!
- Pete Hornberger: Oh my God, there you are. We're losing sponsors, Liz. Did you know that Snuggles the fabric softener bear is gay? He's dating the Charmin cub! I thought they were babies!
- Jack Donaghy: Lemon, obviously I can't approve of someone I've never met.
- Liz Lemon: Yeah well, I'm not letting you meet Criss because you won't approve of him.
- Jack Donaghy: Well then I guess this is a Catch 22, although I don't know for sure because I refuse to read literature that questions the morality of war.
- Jack Donaghy: I would like to ask you why Tracy is outside cursing this network with a megaphone.
- Liz Lemon: It's a good one Jack. Tracy has organized a protest by NBC with his fellow idiots.
- Jack Donaghy: He what? Oh no no no, we need idiots. You need idiots. Who do you think is watching your show?
- Liz Lemon: Funky taste makers?
- Jack Donaghy: Look at this chart: black nerds, Jet Blue passengers who fall asleep with the TV on, pets whose owners have died, and idiots. You need to fix this.
- Tracy Jordan: [voicemail message] Hi, this is Tracy's cell phone. Dotcom, hold the steering wheel, I need to leave my outgoing message. Oh my God, what did I just hit, was that a person? Is that paint or blood? Dotcom, this did not happen! We take this to our graves!
- [beep]
- Liz Lemon: Tracy, this is Liz Lemon, please call the office when you get the chance. As you pointed out, my extension spells out the word "anus" with an "I". Bye.
- [hangs up]