When an elementary school teacher named Angelica gets involved with a newly relocated family, she discovers that they are hiding from more than just a broken marriage. What do you do when Daddy comes home?
The Cloth centers on a secret organization formed by the Catholic Church to counteract the rising number of cases of demonic possessions across the country. The story follows a young godless man who is being recruited into the cloth in order to prepare a new generation with the tools needed to stop the rise of the ultimate evil, Beelzebub. A battle for mankind's existence. The battle for your soul has begun. Written by
I watched this because Danny Trejo and Eric Roberts are in it. It's not like these two are master thespians or anything, but I find them likable enough, even in B movies. ("B" as in "low Budget" or just plain "Bad".) Trejo and Roberts have small parts, with screen time probably totaling less than 10 minutes between them. Eric Roberts seems to be sleepwalking, stoned, or both. The rest of the cast are unrelentingly horrible, either chewing the scenery or mumbling like blocks of wood blessed with the gift of speech.
The dialog is stilted, juvenile, and lacks both wit and sense. The plot, involving a secret society of exorcists battling demons, is inane and vacuous. This idea has been done before a few times: Constantine 2005, Hellboy 2004, The Ninth Gate 1999, for example. All of these, although there is not a masterpiece among them, are infinitely better than this poor offering.
The special effects are incredibly bad, something that is pretty hard to achieve with today's cheap computer graphic technology. It is often impossible to tell what is supposed to be going on with all the random flashes of colored light and moving shots of geological formations. The camera work is amazingly unskillful. In one of Eric Roberts' few scenes, he's talking to a priest whose head is out of frame at eye level.
I wish there were something positive I could say about The Cloth. Oh... there is something; it put my wife, who has been suffering from insomnia recently, to sleep.
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