Tyrion Lannister: [to Cersei] I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you are safe and happy, and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you will know the debt is paid.
Theon Greyjoy: You should be proud in your brother's achievements. I took the great castle of Winterfell with twenty men.
Yara Greyjoy: [scornfully] You're a great warrior. I saw the bodies above your gates. Which one gave you the tougher fight, the cripple or the six year old?
[the rest of the Ironmen snicker mockingly. Theon is enraged]
[Jaime and Brienne are on their way to King's Landing. Jaime keeps teasing Brienne while she leads him to the river]
Jaime Lannister: It's a long way to King's Landing. Might as well get to know one another. Have you known many men? I suppose not. Women? Horses? Aha!
[Jaime winces in pain when Brienne forces him to kneel down near a boat, because she spotted people passing nearby on a bridge]
Jaime Lannister: I didn't mean to give offense, My Lady. Forgive me.
Brienne of Tarth: Your crimes are past forgiveness, Kingslayer.
Jaime Lannister: Why do you hate me so much? Have I ever harmed you?
Brienne of Tarth: You've harmed others - those you were sworn to protect, the weak, the innocent.
Jaime Lannister: Has anyone ever told you you're as boring as you are ugly?
[once the passing people disappear from view, Brienne roughly pulls Jaime back on his feet]
Brienne of Tarth: You will not provoke me to anger.
[Brienne drags Jaime to the river bank]
Jaime Lannister: I already have. Look at you. You're ready to chop my head off. Do you think you could? Do you think you can beat me in a fair fight?
[Brienne drags the boat to the river]
Brienne of Tarth: I've never seen you fight.
Jaime Lannister: The answer is no. There are three men in the kingdoms who might have a chance against me. You're not one of them.
[Brienne pushes the boat into the water]
Brienne of Tarth: All my life men like you have sneered at me. And all my life I've been knocking men like you into the dust.
Jaime Lannister: If you're so confident, unlock my chains. Let's see what happens.
Brienne of Tarth: Do you take me for an idiot? In.
[Brienne gestures Jaime to enter the boat. He complies]
Jaime Lannister: I took you for a fighter, a man - oh, pardon - woman of honor. Was I wrong? You're afraid.
[Brienne enters the boat, moves it away from the bank and starts rowing]
Brienne of Tarth: Maybe one day we'll find out, Kingslayer.
Lord Varys: My Lord Hand, Commander. I must compliment on the Gold Cloaks' performance these last few weeks.
Lord Varys: Did you know there has been a marked drop in thievery?
Tyrion Lannister: I did not know.
Tyrion Lannister: And how did you accomplish this marked drop in thievery?
Bronn: Me and the lads rounded up all the known thieves.
Tyrion Lannister: For questioning?
Bronn: Uh, no.
[Tyrion looks annoyed]
Bronn: It's just the unknown thieves we've got to worry about now.
Tyrion Lannister: We talked about this.
Bronn: Aye, we talked about it. Have you ever been in a city under siege? Maybe this part's not in your books. See, it's not the fighting that kills most people; it's the starving. Food's worth more than gold. Noble ladies sell their diamonds for a sack of potatoes. Things get bad enough, the poor start eating each other. The thieves, they love a siege. Soon as the gates are sealed, they steal all the food. By the time it's all over, they're the richest men in town.
Lord Varys: Given the circumstances, my lord, I believe extreme measures are warranted.
Joffrey Baratheon: You're the master of whisperers, you're supposed to know everything!
Lord Varys: No man can be in all rooms at all times. I have many little birds in the North, my lord, but I haven't heard their songs since Theon Greyjoy captured Winterfell.
Joffrey Baratheon: The Stark forces are distracted. Now is the time to strike.
Tyrion Lannister: To strike? My dear nephew, you do see these men preparing the walls for siege? You do understand Stannis Baratheon sails this way?
Joffrey Baratheon: If my uncle Stannis lands on the shores of King's Landing, I'll ride out to greet him.
Tyrion Lannister: A brave choice, Your Grace. I'm sure your men will line up behind you.
Joffrey Baratheon: They say Stannis never smiles.
[Joffrey briefly unsheathes his dagger]
Joffrey Baratheon: I'll give him a red smile. From ear to ear.
[Joffrey walks away]
Tyrion Lannister: Imagine Stannis' terror.
Lord Varys: I am trying.
Tyrion Lannister: You're an intelligent man. I like to think I'm an intelligent man.
Lord Varys: Oh, no one disputes that, my lord, not even the multitudes who despise you.
Tyrion Lannister: I wish we could converse as two honest, intelligent men.
Lord Varys: I wish we could, too.
Tyrion Lannister: [brief pause] What do you want? Tell me.
Lord Varys: If we're going to play, you'll have to start.
Tyrion Lannister: My brother was the youngest Kingsguard in history. My sister became queen at the age of nineteen. When I reached manhood, my father put me in charge of all the drains and cisterns in Casterly Rock.
Lord Varys: A most highborn plumber.
Tyrion Lannister: The water never flowed better. And all the shit found its way to the sea. Never expected to have any real power. So when my father named me acting Hand...
Lord Varys: You're quite good at being Hand, you know. Jon Arryn and Ned Stark were good men. Honorable men. But they disdained the game and those who played. You enjoy the game.
Tyrion Lannister: I do. Last thing I expected.
Lord Varys: And you play it well.
Tyrion Lannister: I'd like to keep playing it. If Stannis breaches the gates, the game is over.
Lord Varys: They say he burns his enemies alive to honor the Lord of Light.
Tyrion Lannister: The Lord of Light wants his enemies burned. The Drowned God wants them drowned. Why are all the gods such vicious cunts? Where is the god of tits and wine?
Lord Varys: In the Summer Isles, they worship a fertility goddess with sixteen teats.
Tyrion Lannister: We should sail there immediately.
Lord Varys: [brief pause] This morning I heard a song. All the way from Qarth, beyond the Red Waste. Danaerys Targaryen lives.
Tyrion Lannister: A girl at the edge of the world is the least of our problems.
Lord Varys: She has three dragons. But even if what they say is true, it will be years before they are fully grown. And then there'll be nowhere to hide.
Tyrion Lannister: One game at a time, my friend.
Eddison Tollett: Great rangers never get old is the problem. Shit ones neither. It's them in the middle that last a long time.
Jorah Mormont: Careful, Khaleesi. Xaro owns this city and the warlocks have a thousand eyes watching for you... I found one. A ship with a good captain. She leaves for Astapor tomorrow.
Daenerys Targaryen: Astapor?
Jorah Mormont: We cannot stay here.
Daenerys Targaryen: They have my dragons. A mother does not flee without her children.
Jorah Mormont: They're not your children. I know they call you the Mother of Dragons and I know you love them, but you didn't grow them in your womb, they didn't suckle at your breasts. They are dragons, Khaleesi, and if we stay in Qarth we'll die.
Daenerys Targaryen: You should sail to Astapor, I'm sure you'll be safe there.
Jorah Mormont: ...You know I would die for you. I will never abandon you. I'm sworn to protect you, to serve.
Daenerys Targaryen: Then serve me! If my dragons are in the House of the Undying, then take me there.
Jorah Mormont: That's what the warlock wants, he told you so himself. If you enter that place, you will never leave again. His magic is strong.
Daenerys Targaryen: And what of my magic? You saw me step into the fire, you watched the witch burn. What did the flames do to me, do you remember?
Jorah Mormont: ...Until my last breath, I will remember. After I have forgotten my mother's face...
Daenerys Targaryen: ...They are my children. And they are the only children I will ever have... Take me to them.
[after learning that Catelyn has freed Jaime Lannister, Robb and Rickard Karstark confront her in the tent where she is kept prisoner]
Robb Stark: Tell me this isn't true.
[Catelyn looks at Robb, but says nothing]
Robb Stark: Why?
Catelyn Stark: [quietly] For the girls.
Robb Stark: You betrayed me.
Catelyn Stark: Robb...
Robb Stark: No! You knew I would not allow it, and you did it anyway.
Catelyn Stark: Bran and Rickon are captives in Winterfell. Sansa and Arya are captives in King's Landing. I have five children, and only one of them is free.
Rickard Karstark: [disdainfully] I lost one son fighting by you son's side. I lost another to the Kingslayer, strangled with a chain. You committed a treason, because your children are prisoners? I would carve out my heart and offer it to the Father, if he would let my sons wake from their graves and step into a prison cell!
Catelyn Stark: I grieve for your sons, My Lord...
Rickard Karstark: [furiously] I don't want your grief. I want my vengeance. And you stole it from me!
Catelyn Stark: Killing Jaime Lannister would not buy life to your children. But returning him to King's Landing may buy life for mine.
Robb Stark: Jaime Lannister has played you for a fool. You have weakened our position; you brought discord into our camp; and you did all behind my back.
Robb Stark: [to the guards] Make sure she's guarded day and night!
Catelyn Stark: [stands] Robb...
Robb Stark: [turns to the guard, ignoring his mother] How many men did we send on pursuit of the Kingslayer?
Stark Guard: Forty, Your Grace.
Rickard Karstark: Send another forty, with our fastest horses.
[Robb and Rickard Karstark leave the tent]
Catelyn Stark: Robb...
[Robb continues walking away, ignoring his mother. She lowers her head in despair]
Arya Stark: You promised you'd help me.
Jaqen H'ghar: Help was not promised, lovely girl. Only death. There must be others. Give a name, any name.
Arya Stark: And you'll kill them? Anybody?
Jaqen H'ghar: By the Seven New Gods and the Old Gods beyond counting, I swear it.
Arya Stark: All right. Jaqen H'ghar.
Jaqen H'ghar: A girl gives a man his own name?
Arya Stark: That's right.
Jaqen H'ghar: Gods are not mocked. This is no joking thing.
Arya Stark: I'm not joking. A man can go kill himself.
Jaqen H'ghar: Un-name me.
Arya Stark: No.
Jaqen H'ghar: *Please?*
Arya Stark: I'll un-name you.
Jaqen H'ghar: Thank you.
Arya Stark: *If* you help me and my friends escape.
Jaqen H'ghar: [scoffs] This would require more than one life. This is not part of our bargain.
Arya Stark: Fine. Jaqen H'ghar.
Jaqen H'ghar: A girl lacks honor.
Robb Stark: Send word to your son. Any Ironborn who surrender will be allowed to return safely to their homes.
Roose Bolton: A touch of mercy is a virtue, Your Grace. Too much...
Robb Stark: [interrupting] Any Ironborn with the exception of Theon Greyjoy.He betrayed our cause. He betrayed me. And we will hunt him down no matter where he runs.
Roose Bolton: I expect his countrymen will turn on him the minute they hear the offer.