John Casey: [about his gift to Alex] I thought it was a good idea. Dumb, huh?
Chuck Bartowski: No, it's actually quite touching.
Morgan Grimes: Like you're feeling real human emotion.
John Casey: Don't ever say that again! Don't you breathe a word of this to Alex!
General Diane Beckman: Oh Stan, not again.
Stan Lee: How about joining me at the punch bowl?
General Diane Beckman: Enough. You're embarrassing yourself, Stan.
Stan Lee: Well, if that's gonna be your attitude.
Chuck Bartowski: Stan Lee is a spy? That is so weird.
General Diane Beckman: LA spies.
General Diane Beckman: Pucker up, Bartowski. You're about to become a man!
Chuck Bartowski: What? Like a Bar Mitzvah? Something that's a little... what exactly do you have in mind?
[Beckman kisses Chuck]
John Casey: Alex - dad. I just want you to know that I'm proud of you. That I'm sorry I haven't been there for you all those years... And I'm really sorry that I'm having to tell you this recoded on an electronic bear... Electronic bear?
Chuck Bartowski: Nice shot, sis. But I told you to stay at home.
Ellie Bartowski: I am Eleanor Woodcomb. Since when do I do what I'm told? ,, That man took our father away from us. I wasn't going to let him take anybody else.
Chuck Bartowski: Merry Christmas, Ellie.
Ellie Bartowski: Merry Chirstmas, Chuck
Chuck Bartowski: Gentleman! Gentleman, uh... The Buy More is closed. You can go home. Happy Holidays. Maybe drink some water.
Jeff Barnes: Water can only dilute this feeling.
Lester Patel: Plus, fish have sex in it. Jeffrey, let's go for a run.
Chuck Bartowski: Great idea.
Jeff Barnes: Great idea.
Lester Patel: Great idea.
Morgan Grimes: Alright, Chuck, tell me you got some kind of an idea here, cause I'm... I'm a little scared.
Chuck Bartowski: Don't freak out. I've got an idea.
Morgan Grimes: Okay. I just hope it works.
Chuck Bartowski: Me, too.
Morgan Grimes: Seeing as how our lives kind of depend on it.
[Chuck looks intensely at Morgan, and after a short pause]
Morgan Grimes: You knew that already.
Chuck Bartowski: Yeah.
Morgan Grimes: Mm-hmm.
Chuck Bartowski: [after Shaw attempts to flash but fails and Chucks throws a successful punch] You seriously underestimate the power of the Nerd Herd.
Daniel Shaw: The Omen virus, you put it...
Chuck Bartowski: Inside your head. Instead of downloading the Intersect 3.0, you removed it. And it turns out that's the last flash you're ever going to have.
[Chuck throws a successful block and kick]
Chuck Bartowski: I'm a much bigger nerd than you thought I was.
Sarah Walker: Chuck, you should know that, um, while I was tied up in Castle, Shaw kissed me.
Chuck Bartowski: Well, as long as we're airing things out, you should know... that Beckman kissed me.
[Sarah's jaw slowly drops]
General Diane Beckman: [Beckman enters the conversation] Walker, a word.
[Chuck grins sheepishly and walks away]
Sarah Walker: Uh... General, I know about the, um... with you and Chuck.
General Diane Beckman: We all have to make sacrifices for the job.
Big Mike: I want customers to remember the true meaning of Christmas. and get back to what you're supposed to be doing - buying stuff.
Ellie Bartowski: Devon, it's Christmas Eve. We are having a party in six hours. We don't have a Christmas tree. We don't have decorations.
Devon 'Captain Awesome' Woodcomb: I am Eleanor Woodcomb.
Ellie Bartowski: What are you doing?
Devon 'Captain Awesome' Woodcomb: I am Eleanor Woodcomb. Saying your name aloud helps to calm you. Reminds you tnat you are in control of your own actions.
Ellie Bartowski: Yeah, that didn't work.
Chuck Bartowski: [Calling Sarah on her cell] Sarah. Thank God! Shaw broke out of prison. Where are you?... Sarah?
Daniel Shaw: Hello, nerd. Do me a favor - turn on the monitor.
Morgan Grimes: What now, Chuck? Chuck?
[Chuck sits motionless]
Morgan Grimes: This is bad. Tjis is very bad. He's shutting down.
John Casey: Then we take care of Shaw ourselves.
Morgan Grimes: Yeah, but he has the Intersect. I mean, we're going to need a plan - a *really* good plan.
Chuck Bartowski: I've got the plan. Daniel Shaw murdered my father, and now he has my wife. He's going to wish he never left that prison cell.
Chuck Bartowski: What's the best way for me to get into the CIA?
General Diane Beckman: There's only one way in - with me.
Chuck Bartowski: General, I can't tell you how happy I am to hear you say that. but you realize you're putting yourself on the line here.
General Diane Beckman: This is my team. And nobody, *especially* Daniel Shaw, is going to take us down.
Lester Patel: [as they're analyzing the Omen virus] Imagine a world without the Internet. What if it's up to us. Two Buy More employees left to stop the Omen Virus - save the world.
Jeff Barnes: Come on, the government has their best people working on this, right?
Chuck Bartowski: However, if I remember correctly, last time we met face-to-face, I kicked your ass.
Daniel Shaw: Heh. I made sure that would never happen again. No Intersect to help you this time, Chuck.
Chuck Bartowski: I wouldn't be too sure about that. I've been training for a while now.
Daniel Shaw: Oh really? Can you compete with the Intersect 3.0? I can practically catch a bullet with my teeth. But you did some push ups, hit the heavy bag. Oh, just so you know, as you're begging for mercy, your wife is watching.