Talented director Stormy Daniels violates a famous Hitchcock principle
of thriller construction, substituting surprise for suspense in
"Teacher's Pet". Rather lame Wicked Pictures release received a knee-
jerk "Best Feature" award nomination from AVN, from which one might
wrongly conclude it was a weak year, when obviously corruption is the
source of such an unwarranted accolade.
Wicked contract player present and accounted for is Alektra Blue, but
only in an inconsequential supporting role that help keep the potboiler
blot boiling. Title lead is instead assigned to a more age-appropriate
for college coed Gracie Glam, who breezes smugly through the film in
one of her lesser performances.
She's identified as a bitch and No-goodnik from the git-go, and
Stormy's script errs mightily in not having any mystery in it, settling
for the dullest of dull formats, a case history. Marcus London, reduced
to catering status on this project, cameos uncredited in the opening
scene as local coroner, examining a dead body from a dumpster and
reciting CSI style exposition to another cameo-er, Jim Enright as the
homicide cop, who is merely Digital Imaging Technician on the shoot, a
far cry from his A-list directing assignments for Wicked (e.g. "Haunted
Nights" two decades earlier.
The corpse, later pictured in a Student ID photo that is key to
unraveling the "murder mystery" (NOT) resembles Brooklyn Lee, but is
not her, and other intriguing small roles for extras likewise sadly
fail to earn any screen credits (e.g., a beautiful redhead coed).
Glam shows up as a college transfer student, and fellow classmates take
an instant dislike to her, sensing her evil nature without much
provocation. That spoils the whole point of a thriller, where we're
supposed to be fooled about the main character's or potential villain's
true nature, or at least the other players are left in the dark.
So various killings by Glam occur, staged as surprises rather than
suspenseful pay-offs. The plot twists involving these offings are
entertaining in the later reels, including both a fake ending and a
shock ending, but many a re-write and re-thinking by Stormy would have
greatly improved the end result.
Cast is okay going through the motions, including Glam's roommate Ash
Hollywood (before she got her ugly shoulder blade barbed-wire tattoos,
India Summer as the hapless wife of teacher Tony De Sergio, and both
Glam and Alektra. I kept waiting for a Stormy cameo (never happened),
perhaps the only suspenseful aspect of the production.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?