Lucas Cano, (Machete) an ex-bodyguard for the Mexican President, tired of his life style, retires to a remote small town in Mexico, in hope of finding peace. But things do not work out for ... See full summary »
Roman Hernández Cordova
George Castle Jr.,
During an operation of a Mexican Cartel, Machete Cortez and Sartana Rivera intercept the criminals alone, but another group arrives and a masked man kills Sartana. Machete is arrested, accused of killing his beloved Sartana and Sheriff Doakes hangs Machete. But the President of the USA Rathcock pardons and recruits Machete to kill the revolutionary Marcos Mendez that has threatened the USA with a missile with a bomb. Machete goes to San Antonio to meet the Miss San Antonio Blanca Vasquez that will be the liaison between Machete and President Rathcock. Then Machete goes to the brothel of Madame Desdemona to seek out the prostitute Cereza that is Mendez's mistress. Machete meets Mendez and learns that his heart is connected to the missile and only the arm dealer Luther Voz is capable to disarm the bomb. Now Machete needs to bring Mendez to the USA in less than twenty-four hours and save his new country in a dangerous journey with betrayals. Written by
Claudio Carvalho, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
When Voz puts on the metal mask, it is clearly just a part that will cover the face. (He's putting it on towards his face.) But in the next second it appears to be more like a helmet that completely covers the whole head which would have been impossible to be put on the way he did before. See more »
After all the credits have been shown, two short scenes are shown. One is an outtake of one of the last fight scenes, where an unexpected punch is delivered between two women, the other scene is a very short montage of the presidential character posing with guns. See more »
Critics need to lighten up, Machete Kills sports the 3 G's and the 3 S': Girls, Guns and Gore. Story, Substance and Style. This sequel sees Machete Cortez take on Luther Voz, a notorious weapons dealer who as Michelle Rodriguez' Luz puts it "has a missile aimed right up our asses".
My only criticism of this movie is that it didn't need to be two hours. But this is one absolutely eye-popping balls out insane movie I've ever seen, it's gloriously bloody and big on laughs just like the first movie, although this sequel excels in terms of introducing new characters, the relentless killing of keys characters and the hotness of women. Sofia Vergara is wonderful as Desdemona, a "man-eater" as she puts it who goes on a revenge rampage alongside the heavenly sexy Alexa Vega starring as Killjoy, after one of their own is killed. I will never look at Modern's Family Vergara the same way again after watching this movie but that's a good thing, as she puts on her Double D-plated guns and her rocket firing penis-pistol and screams after Machete. I thought Lady Gaga's debut was excellent, she comes across as a genuinely unstable killer, and her acting style is very Tarantino and I hope she has future roles cause she certainly kicked ass and convinced.
The gore and intestinal removal madness is back and as fun as ever, Machete's inventive kills include helicopter blade slashing, literal turning bodies inside out and so much more madness, you won't believe your eyes. The trailer for "Machete Kills Again...In Space" is pure genius, echoing days of MoonRaker alongside many Star Wars references, but throwing in gun toting women just for eye candy. Michelle Rodriguez makes a welcome return and loses her second eye but still fights for Mexico. Amber Heard delivers one of her career best as Miss San Antonio, a feisty and full-on agent working with Machete, but the best moment for Heard is the standoff between her and Rodriguez, it's a violent and bone crunching climax that hits hard. Mel Gibson absolutely kills it as Voz, it's his funniest role and the way he is all playful as the antagonist is so funny against the backdrop of bone- splattering violence. Then there's Carlos Estevez, or as most of you know as Charlie Sheen, using his real name as President RathCock, a foul-mouth say it as it is leader who hires Machete, Sheen is as entertaining as ever, and no one could've played this comedic part any better.
Would I watch it again? Absolutely, this movie is a blast thanks to Robert Rodriguez' amazing style and solid direction, the unbelievable cast all of whom are perfect and the nutty nature that takes place from the cartoonish-ly bloody violence, Gaga's awesome debut, super sexy women (especially Vergara and Vega) and the relentless onslaught of hilarious gags.
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