The LeBrons (TV Series)

Lion (2011)

Jason Weaver: Condor

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Kid : [he and Condor are riding bikes down the street]  Hey C, we're homies, right?

  Condor : You know it.

  Kid : So if you heard that I die, won't you just get a next meal?

  Condor : Before after lunch.

  Kid : After?

  Condor : Uh, Kid, I gotta be honest with you. I'll eat my dinner in probably your portion too.

  Kid : That's good to know.

  Condor : Hey, look, I love you like a brother, but I get mad cranky when I don't eat.

  [Condor holds his stomach as a dog growl is heard offscreen] 

  Condor : If that, I feel a little cranky right now.

  [an angry pitbull is barking offscreen and Condor turns. The pitbull comes onscreen looking angry and chases after Kid and Condor] 

  Kid : Ray Johnson's pitbull! Oh, he hates me!

  Condor : Don't take it personally, Kid. I'm pretty sure the dog gets everybody!

• Condor : [Kid slams the door on Condor's leg after they escape the pitbull]  My leg! Ray Johnson's dog ate my leg!

  Kid : Chill, si. I think we just slammed it in the door.

  Condor : [sigh]  Wait, that's kinda bad, too.

  Business : Hey. How 'bout you boys take that someplace else? Can't you see I'm deliberating?

  [Business is dating a beautiful woman named Bran. Kid and Condor stare at Bran in surprise] 

  Bran : You boys have the scent of sweat, fear, and...

  [sniffs on the kids] 

  Bran : ... desperation.

  Condor : [smells his armpit]  Oh, that has a smell?

  Business : Sure reason to fray this business. We're stringing a jize about to start my own line of collone. You know... like "diddy difitty."

  Condor : 'Kay, my dear. You call it, notorious B-I-Z.

  Business : Hush up, boy. What are you two running from?

  Kid : Ray Johnson's dog.

  Business : Again? I think Bran and I need to parlay.

• Condor : [he and Kid escape the pitbull again and his leg is slammed in the door]  That's gettin' older, son.

  Kid : That dog's crazy! He acts like our own money!

  Business : Boys, let me introduce you to the solution for Johnson's dog.

  Otis the Lion : What's happening, boys?

  [the kids gasp in fear and Condor opens the door only to dive into the pitbull's mouth. Otis talks to the pitbull] 

  Otis the Lion : Spit that kid out. He's mine.

  Pitbull : [spits Condor out]  Kid's all yours. Plus it tastes like desperation.

  Condor : Really? You can taste it?

  Otis the Lion : You think you're all that?

  Pitbull : [scared]  Uh, I was just playing.

  Otis the Lion : How 'bout I'll rip out your head and play ball with it?

  Pitbull : Hey, it's gotta be like that?

  Otis the Lion : Nothing personal.

  Pitbull : [turns around]  Oh, that's relief.

  [turns back and points at the left] 

  Pitbull : Oh look! Baby gazelle!

  [runs off. Kid, Condor and Business look at what the pitbull pointed at] 

  Kid : I don't see anything.

  [the pitbull is running down the street and barking] 

  Otis the Lion : [stares at the putbull, putting sunglasses on]  Why do they always run?