The 89th Academy Awards telecast airs at 8:30 p.m. ET/5:30 p.m. PST, Sunday, Feb. 26, on ABC, hosted by Jimmy Kimmel. Join us for the first IMDb LIVE Viewing Party, a companion show that includes celebrity insight, real-time IMDb data, and more.
Porn is not known for endearing characters, in fact most of the memorable ones have been rough or even sadistic (think Jamie Gillis or Georgina Spelvin at their best). But Nica Noelle puts a very pleasant spin on the XXX motifs with A BEAUTY AND A GEEK, proof that naturalistic, explicit sex has a place in the continuum of plot-based entertainment, and need not be relegated to its current gonzo-dominated ghetto.
Dane Cross exercises some acting chops (beyond his usual humping mode) as the title geek, a guy who in a pivotal scene throws out his video games and even a cocktail table sized book on STAR WARS as he reforms, trying to become a normal enough guy to win the affection of almost girlfriend Dani Jansen.
Dani begins the video rather unsympathetically dumping Dane, complaining of being tired of pretending she is interested in STAR TREK and all the other stereotypical fan boy crap he forces upon her. Dane gets on the horn and calls on Sweet Sinner's resident (non-sex) Earth Mother deLUXE, and she invites him to a dinner out with Dani to get the cute beauty back with the program.
Unbeknownst to our hero and his big Black fairy godmother, Dani has her new boyfriend Manuel Ferrara join them at dinner, and he arrives in his scrubs, a doctor in residency who is theoretically impossible for poor Dane to compete with.
Nica stretches credulity at this point by injecting a wonderful gonzo favorite Avy Scott as the restaurant's waitress, and instead of taking their orders she takes Manuel into a back room where they hump on a pool table for at least half an hour. I liked Avy keeping on her bow tie and high heels during sex, a nice touch.
Distraught, Dane turns to another outside helper, phoning call girl Nina Hartley to teach him how to seduce Dani and win her back from France's Mr. Big Dick. I have not enjoyed Nina's various, often unseemly (black anal gonzo) assignments in the age 50s portion of her career, but she is absolutely delightful here. Her patter is priceless: "Every girl likes to be taken by force" and "Every girl likes getting her hair pulled - it's in the genes". And of course she humps Dane every which way to prove her point.
Before Dane can make his move, Dani has sex with Manuel and he certainly satisfies her in the sack but makes the rookie mistake of saying to her after the money shot: "Avy, you're so incredible". Dani notes "Dane was right -you are too good to be true" and gives Ferrara his walking papers after he tries to offer some lame explanation.
That sets up the finale of the "new improved" Dane winning little Dani, his new-found sexual prowess with her representing a victory for all us geeks out their watching the video. Dani's gimmick of simulating an orgasm (SS's label mantra is "real orgasms") by having her leg and foot quiver suddenly reminds me of a similar trope used currently by Ariella Ferrera, both going to the well too often with this technique. Better is the porn company's stress on the male helping the female get off: after Dane cums on her belly, he shifts to cunnilingus while Dani is masturbating to provide a final release by her and porn's equivalent of a romantic ending.
0 of 0 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?