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"The Angry Video Game Nerd" How the Nerd Stole Christmas (TV Episode 2010) Poster

Quotes

The Angry Video Game Nerd: What turkeys worked on this murky mess of monkey jerky? Some quirky jackass from Albuquerque?

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: I'd rather eat deceased skunk yeast than play inferior arcade ports, like Altered Beast. Altered Beast is a nut-kicking feast I can't stand in the least.

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: Last Action Hero, I can't get passed the first stage. Getting whacked to death by Ernest P. Worrell sends me into a fit of rage.

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: They'd puke at the nauseating effect of Marsupalami; the camera jumps with the character, and that's a bunch of shit sauce and salami. They'd take an axe to Mad Max; they'd take offense to Taboo: The Sixth Sense; they'd shriek squeaks and squeals racing around on Bigfoot's uncontrollable wheels.

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Narrator: Then he ducked down the chimney, a bit absurd, but if Mario could do it, so could the Nerd.

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: Skating may be the best part, but it's still just as delightfully tart. As a broccoli bean burrito eating skunk that's ready to fart.

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Singer: [singing] You're a foul one, Mr. Nerd/ you're a dreadful, drunken schmuck/ your mouth is full of cusses and your mind is full of yuck, Mr. Nerd/ The three words that best describe you are, and I quote, "fick, fack, fuck!"

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: Puss in Boots, that one really sucked. Dodging eagle poop in a car, man it's fucked. Nothing's more high class than the Statue of Liberty going right up your ass.

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Narrator: He brought everything back, all the games for the feast. Then he himself, the Nerd, played Beauty and the Beast.

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Narrator: Welcome, Christmas, bring your cheer. Cheer to all the gamers far and near. Welcome, Christmas, while we play, some pretty fucking shitty games today.

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The Angry Video Game Nerd: Even if you're doing fine, you'll suddenly get hit by a bird. It's as much fun as wringing the stank juice out of a turd.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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