Narrator: There was, once upon a time, a town not far from a big city. A road ran through, but there were only a few businesses. A coffee shop, a hardware store, a sheriff's office. And all kinds of people. Vagrants, run away teens, religious fanatics, retired seniors who, well, it was a town of those who wanted to be left alone. And so they were.
Poe: Of all the melancholy topics, what, according the the universal understanding of mankind, is the most tragic?
Hall Baltimore: Death.
Poe: And when is this most tragic of melancholy topics most poetical? When it most loosely alludes itself to beauty. The death, therefore, of a beautiful girl is unquestionably the most poetical topic in the world. Equally, it is beyond doubt that the lips best suited for such a topic, are those of a man who loved her.
Melvin: You know who came up with Daylight Savings Time, don't you? Hitler. And you know who supports it now? Doctors. And you know why? Golf. They want more time to golf. That's what it's all about. You can't change time. Time changes you.
Hall Baltimore: The fog on the lake reminds me of my first wife - it dissipated with time.
Hall Baltimore: People are saying what's going on up here is evil. Are you worried about that?
Flamingo: Look around. Does this look evil to you?
Poe: Our work must be the grave that we prepare for its lovely talent.
Sam: Hall Baltimore, master of witchcraft no more.
Hall Baltimore: Nevermore.
[they shake hands]
Hall Baltimore: People always ask me "How do you know so much about witches?", and I tell them, "Cause I married one!"
Sheriff Bobby LaGrange: [sarcastically] How does it feel to be the bargain-basement Stephen King?
Hall Baltimore: Not too wonderful.
Poe: Do you dare go further?
Hall Baltimore: What are you talking about? Tell me the ending.
Poe: If you don't stop now, every word that flows from your pen will be your own tale. You. You are the ending you seek.
Poe: During the brightest days of her unparalleled beauty, I loved her. Not as the living and breathing Virginia, but as the Virginia of the dream.