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Longhorns (2011)

Not Rated | | Comedy, Drama, Romance | 25 June 2011 (USA)
Back in 1982, a Texas University student who was curious about the male sex fantasies he had been having, decides he needs to hook up with an out gay student on campus.

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Cast

Cast overview:
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Kevin
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Cesar (as Derek Villanueva)
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Steve
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Justin
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Danny
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Marsha
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Brenda
Sophia Revelli ...
Camille
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Storyline

Beers, steers...and a couple of queers. The Eighties come roaring back in this risqué and sexy comedy involving a group of Texas frat-boys, a remote cabin in the Hill Country and lots of beers, that will give "ride 'em cowboy" a whole new meaning! Written by Anoymous

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

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Biere, Stiere udn ein paar Queere ... (tagline from German poster) See more »

Genres:

Comedy | Drama | Romance

Certificate:

Not Rated | See all certifications »

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Release Date:

25 June 2011 (USA)  »

Also Known As:

Sexy Buffalo Boys  »

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1.78 : 1
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Did You Know?

Goofs

A framed picture in Kevin's dorm room shows Northrup-Grumman's B-2 "Spirit" stealth bomber. The film is set in 1982, but the aircraft was not publicly unveiled until 1988 and was kept as an above-top secret project until that time. See more »

Quotes

Cesar: Don't "Hi" me, closet-whore.
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Crazy Credits

"Longhorns Original Motion Picture Soundtrack available on iTunes, Amazon.com, Rhapsody and Napster." See more »

Connections

References Debbie Does Dallas (1978) See more »

Soundtracks

Interkut
Written and Performed by H.P. Mendoza (as Surely Shirley)
Courtesy of David Lewis Tice Records ©1982
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User Reviews

 
Much potential squandered in unfunny comedy, with redeeming strengths
7 July 2012 | by (United States) – See all my reviews

This could have been a really good movie, but it wore out its one-joke theme - straight guys who love nothing better than masturbating together while watching porn - about the third time it played out. That may be a powerful and persistent fantasy and an infallible source of amusement for lots of gay men, but it's not for me, and watching it in a movie gets old very fast. It wasn't even remotely believable the first time it happened, and it got less believable every time.

The second recurring theme has one man stripping completely naked and standing still for another, fully clothed man to ogle. Each of the five main characters did it once each, with another of the five (two, in one instance) as the clothed ogler. Was that supposed to be funny too, or was it just an extremely clumsy way to get as much full frontal (but as sterile as a nun) nudity as possible into the movie? So the movie is almost unbearably contrived, stupid and unfunny. It has two redeeming strengths, though.

Three of the main cast members are genuine Southerners who talk with real Southern accents, not the Hollywood fake-Southern accents non-Southern actors always affect (even Meryl Streep can't get it right) in movies. Non-Southerners must not be able to tell the difference, but I can, and as a long-time transplant to the North, hearing people who talk like me on screen warms my heart and points out how very, very rarely it happens. Even Southern actors almost never use their native accents in movies, which is sad.

The movie's other strength is the cast, particularly Derek Villanueva and Dylan Vox, who shine (Jacob Newton, though sort of cute, is a little weak as the lead). I wish someone would remake Longhorns with the same cast but as a serious movie, not a very lame, very unfunny comedy.


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