Abigail Spencer: Jessica

Quotes 

• [first lines] 

  Kevin : Hi. Is this?... Are you Jessica?

  Jessica : Yeah.

  Kevin : Okay, you're Jessica.

  Jessica : Yes, I am.

• Kevin : So tell me about you.

  Jessica : Pressure.

  Kevin : Pressure?

  Jessica : Well, yeah. I mean, who just talks about themselves except, like, actors?

• Jessica : What should we call you, then? I mean, you're gonna need a name. You look like a Justin. How about Justin?

  Kevin : Justin? Really? I don't know. I don't think Justin feels right. I mean, they've been calling me John Doe and that definitely doesn't feel right.

  Jessica : How about Michael? I mean, I like the name Michael. In fact, a psychic once told me I was going to marry a man named Michael. I mean, not you, of course. Someone whose real name is Michael. Renaming doesn't count.

• Kevin : No offense.

  Jessica : None taken. Do you ever notice that the only time people say 'no offense' is when they've clearly just offended someone? I mean, not me, but, you know, in general. I just always thought it was a really stupid thing to say. No offense.

  Kevin : None taken.

• [last lines] 

  Ms. Laird : Lights out for the both of you.

  Jessica : Next time I get to have amnesia!

  Ms. Laird : No you don't, princess. Next time, I get to be the one with amnesia.