The Morecambe & Wise Show (TV Series)

Episode #9.2 (1976)

Eric Morecambe: Self

Photos 

Quotes 

• Michele Dotrice : [Ernie is introducing guest star Michele Dotrice to the audience]  How wonderful of you to ask me to appear in one of your plays.

  Ernie Wise : Yes, it is, isn't it! I think I can honestly say that you must be one of my biggest fans. I presume you've seen all of my plays?

  Michele Dotrice : Oh, yes, every one.

  Ernie Wise : I thought so.

  Michele Dotrice : But I'm sure this one will be good.

  Eric Morecambe : [Eric enters through the stage curtain, seeming to be surprised by the guest star who is wearing a flowing pink frock]  Michael, how are you? How nice to see you. Are you dressed for the show, or an operation? Ernie's play, as you must know, Ernie's play will shock.

  Ernie Wise : Yes, it is a shocking play. It is what they call 'avant garter'. As a matter of fact, it's a copy of a film I saw, a French, rather French, naughty film, called 'Enamel'.

  Eric Morecambe : It's got a lot of polish.

  Michele Dotrice : Do you mean, 'Emmanuelle'?

  Ernie Wise : 'Emmanuelle'... ah, that's it, 'Emmanuelle'. I hated it the first time I saw it. Hated it even more the second time!

  Eric Morecambe : [paying no attention to Ernie, he is focusing instead on the beautiful guest star's cleavage]  Are you - are you, Michael, quite willing to divest yourself of certain garments, including nether garments? Are you quite willing to, you know what I mean by... are you quite willing to...

  Michele Dotrice : Well, I have no objection, if it's within the context of the play...

  Eric Morecambe : It's got nothing to do with the play, I'm asking you a straightforward question.