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In April 1881, wounded outlaw and fugitive Billy the Kid staggers into the desert town of Hell's Heart to rest and recuperate only to soon discover that voracious supernatural entities lurk in the town and want him from a trophy.
Chelsea Rae Bernier
I don't know who owns this house that director DeCoteau uses in all his 1313 installments, but should it ever go on the market, the realtor has his work cut out for him. The huge California mansion has its exteriors and interiors lavishly filmed in slo-mo for the 1st 20 minutes of the movie (and most installments) as a guy in underwear invariably roams the corridors and patio in a trance-like state for no reason at all.
20 minutes of a guy walking around in his underwear is a long time, even when you're gay, so I can't imagine a straight man inadvertently renting one of the 1313 movies looking for a cheap scare. There's none to be found, and "Haunted Frat" is no exception.
After the aforementioned 20 minutes intro, followed by a shower scene (chest & legs only, DeCoteau even forbids himself butt shots in his quest for R-rated gay entertainment) and a long swimming sequence, the titular ghost (and the only representative of the fair sex) is introduced, as it touches the body of the resting swimmer then teases another bespectacled fratboy (presumably a geek, though geeks are never that hot). The geek reveals to one of his frat buddies that this very modern mansion was once a sanitarium, in which case the redecorator did a hell of a job. This explains why the ghost of a former "Beverly Hills 90210" extra haunts the place, looking for bodies of twuds (that cross between twinks and studs you find in Bel-Ami) to graze with her immaterial hands.
At one point, two guys run, which is a nice change of pace for the apathic chiller which will also send you in a trance-like state, so make sure you also own white briefs to fit in the decorum.
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