Gracie Allen: Gracie Allen

Quotes 

• Gracie Allen : He's a wonderful husband and I've been married to him for years - and the only regret I've ever had is that I'm not a man so I could get to know him better!

• Gracie Allen : Blanche, you're always laughing at George and, believe me, if he was your husband you'd find nothing to laugh about!

• Gracie Allen : You know, some people may dislike George but I want you all to remember one thing. For every five people who don't like George there are fifty who don't even know him, and you can all put that in your hat and smoke it!

• Gracie Allen : Well, then we visited the Metropolitan Museum and the guide showed us the skeleton of this tremendous animal, and he said the bones of this dinosaur were dug up recently in Siberia and it's believed to be the biggest animal that ever lived. So I said, "Well, it couldn't have been the BIGGEST animal. What about the one who buried the bones?"

• Gracie Allen : First we went to Grant's Tomb and then to The Lincoln Tunnel, and I said it was nothing but favoritism.

  George Burns : Favoritism?

  Gracie Allen : Well, yes. I said, "If they could bury Grant in a tomb, they certainly could have found a better spot for Lincoln."

  George Burns : Well, look at where they put poor Washington, under a bridge.

  Gracie Allen : Well, that's gratitude for you.

• Gracie Allen : The last place we visited was The Statue of Liberty and, George, did you know that there were steps inside and you could climb right up through the body?

  George Burns : Sure, I knew that.

  Gracie Allen : Well, so I went right up to the top and it was kinda drafty up there and I sneezed and... I had the funniest sensation.

  George Burns : Well, what was so funny about it?

  Gracie Allen : Well, it was the first time I ever caught cold in somebody else's head.