Transported to Barsoom, a Civil War vet discovers a barren planet seemingly inhabited by 12-foot tall barbarians. Finding himself prisoner of these creatures, he escapes, only to encounter Woola and a princess in desperate need of a savior.
A decade after his heroic defeat of the monstrous Kraken, Perseus-the demigod son of Zeus-is attempting to live a quieter life as a village fisherman and the sole parent to his 10-year old son, Helius. Meanwhile, a struggle for supremacy rages between the gods and the Titans. Dangerously weakened by humanity's lack of devotion, the gods are losing control of the imprisoned Titans and their ferocious leader, Kronos, father of the long-ruling brothers Zeus, Hades and Poseidon. The triumvirate had overthrown their powerful father long ago, leaving him to rot in the gloomy abyss of Tartarus, a dungeon that lies deep within the cavernous underworld. Perseus cannot ignore his true calling when Hades, along with Zeus' godly son, Ares (Edgar Ramírez), switch loyalty and make a deal with Kronos to capture Zeus. The Titans' strength grows stronger as Zeus' remaining godly powers are siphoned, and hell is unleashed on earth. Enlisting the help of the warrior Queen Andromeda (Rosamund Pike), ... Written by
Warner Bros. Pictures
Thinking of going to see Wrath of the Titans? In 3d? Save yourself some pocket money and do the following instead: lie on the ground and pour a mixture of soil and skittles slowly into your eyes whilst mumbling the names of Greek Gods. This will have the same entertainment value as the film, and a considerably better plot.
Having seen the remake of the original, I went into Wrath of the Titans with my expectation level pretty low. Five minutes in, I quickly lowered it further. Ten minutes in... I buried my expectation level under my seat and stomped it into the ground - hard. But however low I set the bar, the film went lower. It's unimaginably dire.
There's simply nothing redeemable about the film at all. Even the impressive effects are ruined by awful direction that renders them no more engaging than watching a ten year old playing video games through a kaleidoscope.
Everyone involved in making Wrath of the Titans should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves; and to be fair Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes clearly are as they show it on screen. They both look embarrassed to be a part of it. I'm embarrassed that I bore witness to it. Please don't be a statistic and join us. There's nothing to see here - move along, move along.
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