- At Travis' graduation, Bobby tries not to make a scene, but Jules makes one when Travis doesn't mention her in his speech.
- Jules encourages Travis to submit a graduation speech. Despite Grayson's warning, a curious Jules reads the speech without permission and is left crushed when she finds she's not been acknowledged. Meanwhile, Ellie uncharacteristically does something nice for Laurie, and Bobby tries to restrain himself from embarrassing Travis on his big day.—ABC Publicity
- Travis claims his high school graduation is no big deal, but with encouragement writes the winning 'ordinary student' speech, which praises Bobby's paternal merit. Grayson's budding love life with Jules suffers badly from her frustration not to get public thanks, but he stops her from ruining the boy's day. Bobby finds some dignity by using a notebook.—KGF Vissers
- Jules (Courteney Cox) is channeling her inner Monica and Chandler by insisting Ellie (Christa Miller) keep her mouth shut regarding Jules' relationship with Grayson (Josh Hopkins). (Does this mean Laurie (Busy Philipps) will do a striptease to make Grayson confess? We can hope!) But they're even more excited about reading an online study which suggest middle-aged women can stay skinny by drinking moderate amounts of alcohol. They're practically giddy, since they read it on the Internet...
EVERYBODY: IT MUST BE TRUE!!
Travis (Dan Byrd) greets the "booze bags," and everybody is excited about his graduation. Jules and Bobby even go down to get graduation tickets. (There's an actual office for this. We didn't have one of those in high school. Hell, I had to go to work the day of my graduation. What kind of fantasy crap is this?!?!?!?) Laurie apolgizes that she has to be in the Bahamas with Smith, but she has that lifelong fantasy of going to countries with handsome black men wandering around, and she just can't pass it up.
Andy (Ian Gomez) asks Travis about a speech one of the students gives at graduation: the everyman speech. Travis didn't even submit his name because he doesn't think graduating high school is a big deal. Not the right thing to say in front of your mom if you're an only child. (If you have 7 kids and you're the 7th to do it, you're lucky if anybody even shows up.) Everyone is shocked, because Bobby peaked at graduation...and was proud of it. Andy was bald by 16, so he bought the beer for everyone. (Important job, best way to get women if you're ugly.) But Travis doesn't want anybody (re: Jules) to make a big deal about it. That's just throwing down the gauntlet at Jules. And she wants Bobby (Brian Van Holt), Andy, and Grayson involved in it.
It turns out Travis was just blowing hot air and was depressed about not making any sort of mark in high school. The best he could do was a goofy picture of him trying to push the creepy woodshop teacher into the band saw, which got Photoshopped out anyway. He admits it to Jules and she tries to play off high school as not being significant for her. Then he whips out her yearbook from 1988 (cough-BULLCRAP-cough), where she is all over the place, including dancing onstage with Bruce Springsteen. (Gee, did they have to Photoshop that picture?) And Courteney actually demonstrates the dance she did onstage with Bruce Springsteen.
40 pictures of his mom in her yearbook later, Travis is even more depressed. Jules has an idea: write the "everyman" speech. He does the "disappointed" fake-out before telling her they picked his speech. Jules wants to go down to the mall to get a t-shirt with Travis' picture on it, because she wants to "wear the moment." She should get a new hat for Ellie on the way, since Laurie went psycho and cut up Ellie's hat after being insulted by Ellie for the last time.
Travis thanks Jules for everything she did, despite wearing that sweatshirt with her picture and his covered by his hands. He departs, not even realizing he was sitting on Grayson's face (there was a blanket between them, thankfully). Grayson wants to continue where they left off, but Jules stole Travis' speech, ony to discover she isn't mentioned, but Bobby is.
Grayson is wondering if anyone is having a worse morning than him. Yeah, a hot brunette in lingerie is straddling you and asking you to get coffee. Life sucks, doesn't it? Of course, Jules is going ballistic that Bobby gets an entire story about chasing that red balloon with the $2,000 in it and she doesn't get a mention. But Laurie might be able to top it, since Ellie wants to tear the classy dress that she bought that Ellie insulted and started the whole fight in the first place. However, Laurie is so upset, she doesn't even care that Ellie broke in through the window and wants to shred it, which is no fun for Ellie. It turns out Laurie was upset at Jules because she wouldn't excuse Ellie from missing Travis' graduation, but Laurie was OK to miss it. The dress was actually for the graduation, not Smith. She made up the whole vacation. Laurie is scared that Jules doesn't regard her as such as close friend, but Ellie tells her she's crazy. If Jules could only save one of them from a fire, Ellie couldn't honestly say which one it would be. Laurie thinks that is sweet and replaces Ellie's hat.
Bobby found the perfect way to embarrass Travis about graduation: an inflatable gorilla with Travis' face on it. Travis wants to go one day without being embarrassed, but Jules is reminding him about the house she put over his head, helping him learn how to read, and every other major event that took place in his life that she helped him with.
At the graduation (or fantasy draft camp, as Barb calls it), Travis tells Jules that he is mentioning Bobby because Bobby has self-esteem issues about peaking in high school, and Travis tells her how much he loves her and appreciates all she did for him. She is touched, and Bobby won't hear the speech anyway, since he went to chase the red balloon with the $2,000 in it. But Travis saw the balloon too.
TRAVIS' SPEECH: "I love you, Dad! Thank you, everybody!"
And everybody goes to chase the balloon, except Ellie and Grayson. He thinks they're silly, but he thanks Ellie for letting him wear her big hat.
But now Andy knows about Jules and Grayson, since it grosses him out to see it, and they need him to go get takeout.
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