Abed Nadir: [to Troy] Make me proud. Be the first black man to make it to the end.
Annie Edison: Guys? Shirley's costume is once again unintentionally ambiguous. I don't know who she's supposed to be, but she's definitely not Miss Piggy. Repeat: not Miss Piggy. You're on your own.
[zombie Annie approaches Troy wearing her Little Red Riding Hood costume]
Troy Barnes: Annie. My, what big fists you have. In your face!
[Jeff, Troy, and Abed sneak through the basement]
Jeff Winger: Quiet, nerds! Do you hear something?
[They sneak forward. Suddenly, a cat jumps in front of them]
Jeff Winger: Jeez!
Jeff Winger: It was just a cat. Let's keep going.
[They continue through the basement. The cat jumps in front of them again]
Troy Barnes: Holy crap!
[They continue to sneak through the basement. The cat jumps in front of them again]
Jeff Winger: What is up with that cat?
Troy Barnes: Is someone throwing it?
Abed Nadir: Keep going.
[They continue. The cat jumps in front of them again]
Jeff Winger: You know, let's not keep going. Because there's an insane cat down here!
Troy Barnes: But what about the zombies?
Jeff Winger: Back burner, Troy! This cat must be dealt with!
[Chang approaches Jeff and Britta dressed as a female figure skater]
Señor Chang: Guess who I am.
Britta Perry: Michelle Kwan?
Señor Chang: Wrong.
Jeff Winger: Kristi Yamaguchi?
Señor Chang: Peggy Flemming. And you have just been proven racist by the racist prover.
[Rich turns into a zombie]
Rich: [slurred speech] I thought that maybe I was special.
Britta Perry: Special? You're not special! I'm special!
[she pulls up her sleeve to reveal a bite mark on her arm]
Britta Perry: I was bit ten minutes ago and I'm...
[her speech slurs as she turns into a zombie]
Jeff Winger: Oh, great - nobody's special!
[Troy re-enters the zombie infested library in his Power Loader costume]
Troy Barnes: That's right. Witness the power of imagination!
[the zombies easily rip his armor off]
Troy Barnes: Okay. I don't know why I thought this would work.
[zombie Leonard, dressed as a pumpkin, makes a move on Shirley]
Shirley Bennett: Leonard, behave yourself. I'm a Christian woman.
[Leonard persists and Shirley holds up her index finger]
Shirley Bennett: Leonard, you better back that pumpkin ass up or I'm gonna make a pie.
Abed Nadir: Where's your costume?
[We see Troy with his shirt off, wearing a toilet seat cover around his neck with "Dracula" written on it]
Troy Barnes: Trying something new.
Abed Nadir: But our costumes go together. If you're not who you are, then I'm just some guy in a spandex suit and a bike helmet.
Troy Barnes: Well, I'm a sexy Dracula.
Abed Nadir: You mean vampire.
Troy Barnes: I don't need to know which Dracula to know I'm a Dracula. Nerd.
Rich: [checking someone's temperature] A hundred and two. This may be food poisoning.
Dean Pelton: Rich. What did I tell you?
Rich: To rule out food poisoning.
Dean Pelton: Yes, that's true. But especially don't say it out loud.
[Star-Burns visits the quarantine area dressed as a pirate]
Star-Burns: Who wants to walk my plank, huh?
[Pierce grabs his arm and bites him. Everyone screams]
Rich: Okay, I'm ruling out food poisoning.
[the study group takes shelter in the study room]
Troy Barnes: Shouldn't we be barricading the doors?
Abed Nadir: No, I think we're okay.
[he peeks through the blinds and sees a zombie throw herself against the window]
Abed Nadir: Let me help you.
[Rich, dressed as a banana, examines Star-Burns after Pierce bites him]
Rich: His symptoms are progressing even faster than everyone else's.
Annie Edison: How much of that taco meat stuff did you eat, Star-Burns?
Star-Burns: I didn't eat any. My name's Alex.
Annie Edison: Whoa, it must have transferred through Pierce's bite.
Rich: I think you're right. Hey, you make quite the little nurse.
Annie Edison: Thank you, Rich. You are quite the banana.
Star-Burns: Why don't you guys just get a room?
[Turns into a zombie]
Rich: Hey, Jeff. It's me, Rich from pottery class. Doc Potterywood, remember?
Annie Edison: Rich, not now! Guys, there's some kind of infection at the party that's making people act weird and bite others. We need to coordinate an orderly evacuation without causing unnecessary panic.
[we hear a woman scream and see her being bitten by infected Leonard]
Troy Barnes: Holy crap! Leonard's a zombie!
Abed Nadir: There. There's a window. If we climb that chain-link fence, we can get up the wall and squeeze through it.
[Jeff looks at the door, then his suit]
Jeff Winger: I vote we take the door.
Abed Nadir: He doesn't want to dirty his suit.
Troy Barnes: For real?
[Jeff opens the door and lets the zombies in]
Jeff Winger: Clothes make the man, Troy. What the hell?
[the zombies wrestle Jeff to the floor. Zombie Rich enters wearing Jeff's jacket]
Jeff Winger: That's my jacket! My jacket! You're stretching it! You're stretching it!