Leslie Knope: A complete list of every slogan we've ever had:
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, the Paris of America"
Leslie Knope: "The Akron of Southwest Indiana"
Leslie Knope: "Welcome German Soldiers", after the Nazis took France our mayor kind of panicked
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, the factory fire capital of America"
Leslie Knope: "Welcome Vietnamese Soldiers"
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, Engage with Zorp". For a brief time in the 70's our town was taken over by a cult.
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, Zorp is dead, long live Zorp"
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, it's safe to be here now"
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, birthplace of Julia Roberts", that was a lie, she sued so we had to change it.
Leslie Knope: "Pawnee, home of the world famous Julia Roberts lawsuit"
Leslie Knope: "Welcome Taliban Soldiers"
Leslie Knope: and our current slogan: "Pawnee, first in friendship, fourth in obesity"
Donna Meagle: Oh, I love any book about vampires, werewolves, monsters, zombies, sorcerers, beasties or time-traveling romances.
[Holds up a book of Twilight]
Donna Meagle: And if I had an hour alone with Robert Pattinson, he would forget all about Skinnylegs McGee. I'll tell you that much.
Kelly Larson: You look sad.
Tom Haverford: You look like an old goon who's obsessed with a kid's book.
Kelly Larson: It's a girl, isn't it? I can tell. It's the look that Mike had on his face when Bella turned him down for the dance.
Tom Haverford: Oh yeah? Is it? What look did your mom have on her face when she realized her son was a complete failure?
Kelly Larson: Okay. I'll be quiet. But I do know something about heartbreak. And you know who else does?
Tom Haverford: Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds?
Kelly Larson: No. A little lady named Twilight author Stephenie Meyer.
[Throws Tom a copy of Twilight]
Donna Meagle: [Enters room] You should listen to him. Those books are GOOD.