When a blog accuses TGS of being misogynistic, Liz hires an upcoming female comedian, Abby Flynn. Liz's plan backfires when Abby seems to be falling into female stereotypes, and Liz and Jenna decide to put Abby in her place. Meanwhile, Jack Donaghy intends to become the successor to KableTown but can only achieve this by eliminating the competition, the granddaughter to the CEO, Kaylie Hooper.
Liz believes that her new female guest writer perpetuates negative female stereotypes and is bad for women, while Jack discovers that he has his hands full trying to get rid of the heir to the Kabletown empire.
- Open with Jenna announcing "I made the internet." She's on the feminist site JOANofSNARK.com, but the article about the freshest female voice is actually a profile of standup Abby Flynn. Jenna's piece is about how TGS hates women. A few flashbacks to recent skits seems to confirm the conclusion.
Jack confirms to Liz that yes, she does hate women. It's not her fault, he points out. Liz is predisposed to attack other strong women while competing for the attention of important men like Jack, Hercules, the Highlander and God. Liz doesn't buy it and to prove she's pro-women she wants to hire Abby as a guest writer. Jack approves once he sees how good-looking Abby is. Jack talks about his desire to buy Kabletown at some point, but says it's a family company and Hooper's 14-year old granddaughter Kaylie could stand in his way. His plan is to guide her away from a career in TV so she will no longer be a rival.
The rest of the writers decide the only way for them to impress Abby is to assume new identities. The plan is for Frank to pretend he's rich, Toofer that he's a bad-boy and Lutz will adopt a British accent.
Jack takes Kaylie on a tour of the TGS floor. She tells him that she's interested in marine biology and is excited when Jack tells her he knows one of her favorite explorers, a Dr. Ballard. Jack tells Kaylie he and Dr. Ballard can take her on a private tour of the Museum of Natural History and she starts to freak out.
Just after Liz assures the writers that changing their personalities is the kind of activity that will no longer be allowed once Abby shows up. On cue she arrives with a super-tight t-shirt, pigtails and talking in a sexy baby voice.
Jack brags to Liz about Kaylie's interest in marine biology and mentions he too had an interest in that field when he was a kid. After Abby walks by with a popsicle in her mouth talking about not wearing any underwear Jenna is furious at Liz. Abby is using some of Jenna's favorite moves and Jenna views her as competition. Jenna wants to tear her down but Liz wants to fix Abby and show her she doesn't need to act like that.
Jack takes Kaylie to the museum. While there Jack re-kindles some of his interest in the ocean and for a moment fanaticizes about being in a ship.
Liz meets Abby at a nearby statue of Eleanor Roosevelt. She tells her TGS is a "safe place" and gives her permission to drop the sexy baby act and be her real self. But Abby tells Liz that she is not putting on an act; this is who she really is. She points out that Liz is judging her by her appearance. She thinks she is using sexuality the same way Liz uses her glasses (to look smart).
Jack starts reading his autobiography and stares longingly at a boyhood picture of him and Jacques Cousteau. He tells Kenneth that he doesn't like the idea of being remembered as just a successful businessman and thinks he still has time to re-invent himself as a famous oceanographer while Kaylie runs Kabletown.
Jenna is fed-up with Abby. But before letting Jenna take over Liz shows her a standup routine she found of Abby's online. She is really a smaller-chested brunette named Abby Grossman who speaks normally and is a cerebral comedian. Abby has also changed her nose and her chin. Liz doesn't understand why she is no longer the smart, strong woman she was and plans to expose Abby in front of the staff in order to help her.
Jack stares at a thank-you collage Kaylie sent him and notices something strange. He immediately head to Kaylie high school. Jack points out the picture of Cousteau she put in the card is from his autobiography and pulls a copy of "Jack Attack" out of her backpack. Kaylie's face turns cold and she admits that the marine biology thing was just an act. She knew that it was a passion of his and was trying to get him out of the way the same way he was trying to get her out of the way. They exchange insults and make threats about a future rivalry.
Liz pulls out the video of Abby's real self. Liz tells her she's posted the standup routine on JOANofSNARK where the whole world can see it. Abby calls Liz a "stupid, meddling bitch" and drops the baby voice. She tells Liz that she changed her look because her insane ex-husband is trying to kill her. She surrounds herself with men (like Lutz, who she slept with) because she feels safer should the ex-husband show up. A UPS man shows up with a delivery from the ex-husband. It's an empty box with a note saying it's the perfect size for her head. Abby says she has six hours to change he appearance again and calls Liz a woman-hating "Judas" as she leaves. Jenna gives Liz two thumbs up.