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Adrián García Bogliano
Magdalena De Santo
"Star Vehicle" follows the downward spiral of movie driver Donald Cardini, a self-professed movie buff with a penchant for explosive violence when provoked. Driving the stars of low-budget movies, along with their fragile egos, to and from locations in the middle of nowhere, pushes Don's buttons in all of the wrong directions. When Luke, the young and self-absorbed writer/director challenges Don's authority, murder and mayhem ensues. The movie's Scream Queen' starlet, Riversa Red, to her dismay finds herself the target of Don's obsession. With his encyclopedic knowledge of her "body" and body of work, Don worms his way onto Riversa's good side, no easy task. Not knowing whether to fear or friend Don, Riversa finds herself at the center of a cyclone with Luke and Don both vying for her attention. A mysterious Hotel Bellboy and an unknown "watcher in the woods" lend themselves to the growing suspense as the cast and crew hold-up at Forest Grove Lodge. After a couple of grueling days ... Written by
The quality just plummets further in Ryan Nicholson's new film.
The plot is actually a good idea. A guy who drives actors and actresses to and from their filming locations finally gets to meet his favourite actress but things soon turn dark when he decides he's going to make his own movie.
The movie kicks off with some ridiculous scene which is neither explained or has any relevance on the plot other than to put some blood and guts in there to keep the gore-hounds happy. The film then just crawls along with terrible dialogue until the next gore scene is just shoehorned in to stop you from getting bored or falling asleep. The acting from the start as you'd expect in this grade of movie isn't the best. The two main leads are acceptable but everyone else is pretty bad. The film really suffers in its pacing which is further hampered by lots of static camera shots. Sometimes almost whole scenes filmed from one angle. Some of the gore effects are also spoilt by some terrible editing.
I don't know if Nicholson is trying to move away from his earlier films over the top set pieces. But the fact that they're not in here makes you notice how bad the script is. It neither stays truly gritty or goes all out over the top. So you're left wondering what the films trying to do.
I remember when I was a kid in a drama lesson at school. The teacher got us to make up a little play. They only gave us twenty minutes to come up with something. When the twenty minutes were up we hadn't come up with an ending. We thought, well we can sort something out while the other groups are showing there's. Well we were first. So we started and when we got to the ending we just started making stuff up. It was a complete mess but we got through it. The reason I'm telling this story is because the last twenty minutes of this film reminded me of that. It's a complete mess that just seems made up as it's going along. Just a real disappointment. I hope if Ryan Nicholson gets to make another film he spends a little more time actually writing a script rather than letting his actors improvise the film.
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