Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: [to Mrs. Crawley] You are quite wonderful, the way you see room for improvement wherever you look. I never knew such reforming zeal.
Isobel Crawley: I take that as a compliment.
[turns and walks in the other direction]
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: [laughs] I must have said it wrong.
Lady Mary Crawley: You should learn to forget what I say. I know I do.
Lady Sybil Crawley: I don't know why we bother with corsets. Men don't wear them, and they look perfectly normal in their clothes.
Lady Mary Crawley: Not all of them.
Sarah O'Brien: [about Mrs. Hughes meeting an old flame] If she's got a boyfriend, I'm a giraffe.
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: Won't you miss Ireland?
Tom Branson: Ireland, yes. But not the job. The mistress was a nice lady, but she only had one car and she wouldn't let me drive it over 20 miles an hour. So it was a bit... well, boring, so to speak.
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: [about Branson, the new chauffeur] He seems a bright spark after poor old Taylor. And to think Taylor's gone off to run a tea shop. I cannot feel it will make for a very restful retirement, can you?
Charlie Carson: I would rather be put to death, m'Lord.
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: ...Quite so.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: [talking of how to introduce Mary to more society] How about some house parties?
Cora Crawley, Countess of Grantham: She's been asked to one next month by Lady Anne McNair.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Most terrible idea; she doesn't know anyone under a hundred.
Cora Crawley, Countess of Grantham: I might send her over to visit my aunt; she could get to know New York.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Oh, I don't think things are quite that desperate.
Mrs. Hughes: I've sent Anna to bed with a cold, so I need you to manage the young ladies.
Sarah O'Brien: What, all three of them? I'm not an octopus. Why can't Gwen do it?
Mrs. Hughes: Because she is not a lady's maid.
Sarah O'Brien: *I* am not a slave!
Matthew Crawley: The question is, what do I say to Cousin Violet?
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: Oh, don't worry about that. I can handle her.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: [Violet enters the room] Really? Well if you can, you must have learned to *very* recently.
Lady Mary Crawley: Do you know where His Lordship is?
Charlie Carson: Gone to bed, m'Lady. He felt tired after he put Lady Grantham into the car.
Lady Mary Crawley: I bet he did.
Lady Sybil Crawley: [Miss O'Brien doing Lady Sibyl's hair] Thank you, O'Brien, I'll manage now.
Lady Sybil Crawley: [to herself] Odious woman.
Lady Mary Crawley: The only one who never sticks up for me in all this is you. Why is that?
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: You are my darling daughter and I love you, hard as it is for an Englishman to say the words.
Anna Smith: I love you, Mr. Bates. I know it's not ladylike to say it, but I'm not a lady, and I don't pretend to be.
Lady Mary Crawley: [referring to her mother] If you think she'll ever recover from carrying the body of Mr. Pamuk from one side of the house to the other, then you don't know her at all.
Anna Smith: Well, I didn't mean recover exactly... just get past it.
Lady Mary Crawley: She won't do that either. When she dies, they'll cut her open, and find it engraved on her heart.
Matthew Crawley: Is your life proving satisfactory, apart from the "Great Matter," of course?
Lady Mary Crawley: Women like me don't have a life. We choose clothes, and pay calls, and work for charity, and do the season. But, really, we're stuck in a waiting room, until we marry.
Matthew Crawley: I've made you angry.
Lady Mary Crawley: My life makes me angry, not you.
Mrs. Hughes: Before I first came here as head housemaid, I was walking out with a farmer. When I told him I'd taken a job at Downton, he asked me to marry him. I was a farmer's daughter from Argyle, so I knew the life. He was very nice. But then I came here and I-I did well, and I... I didn't want to give it up. So, I told him no, and he married someone else. She died three years ago, and last month, he wrote asking to see me again, and I agreed, because all this time, I've wondered.
Charlie Carson: Go on.
Mrs. Hughes: I met him the other night. We had dinner at the Grantham Arms and after, he took me to the fair.
Charlie Carson: And he was horrible and fat and red-faced and you couldn't think what you ever saw in him?
Mrs. Hughes: He was still a nice man. He is still a nice man. Well, he was a bit red-faced, and his suit was a little tight, but none of that matters. In the real ways, he hadn't changed.
Charlie Carson: And he proposed again... and you accepted?
Mrs. Hughes: In many ways, I wanted to accept. But I'm not that farm girl anymore. I was flattered, of course, but... I've changed, Mr Carson.
Charlie Carson: Life's altered you, as it's altered me. And what would be the point of living if we didn't let life change us?
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: If I'd made my own fortune and bought Downton for myself it should be yours without question, but I did not. My fortune is the work of others who laboured to build a great dynasty. Do I have the right to destroy their work or impoverish that dynasty? I am a custodian, my dear, not an owner. I must strive to be worthy of the task I've been set. If I could take Mama's money out of the estates Downton would have to be sold to pay for it. Is that what you want? To see Matthew a landless peer with a title, but no means to pay for it?
Daisy Robinson: Thomas is lovely in every way. He's funny and handsome, and he's got such lovely teeth.
Mrs. Patmore: He's not for you, Daisy.
Daisy Robinson: 'Course not. He's too good for me, I know that.
Mrs. Patmore: No. He's not too good.
Daisy Robinson: What then?
Mrs. Patmore: He's not the boy for you, and you're not the girl for him.
Daisy Robinson: Isn't that what I just said? And why would he be when he's seen and done so much and I've been nowhere and done nothing?
Mrs. Patmore: Perhaps Thomas has seen and done more than is good for him.
[seeing that she's still not getting it]
Mrs. Patmore: He's not a ladies' man.
Daisy Robinson: [uncertainly] But innit a blessed relief?
Mrs. Patmore: Daisy, Thomas is a troubled soul.
Daisy Robinson: I don't know what you mean, Mrs Patmore.
Mrs. Patmore: [giving up] Oh, nothing. I don't mean anything.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: One can't go to pieces at the death of every foreigner; we'd all be in a state of collapse whenever we opened a newspaper.
Joseph Molesley: I've got Erysipelas, Your Ladyship.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Ooh... oh, I am sorry.
Dr. Clarkson: Mrs. Crawley tells me she's recommended nitrate of silver and tincture of steel.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Well, is she making a suit of armor?
Lady Mary Crawley: So, I am just to find a husband and get out of the way?
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: You could stay here if you married Matthew,
Lady Mary Crawley: You know my character father, Father. I'd never marry a man that I was told to. I'm stubborn. I wish I wasn't, but I am.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Good heavens, what am I sitting on?
Matthew Crawley: A swivel chair.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Another modern brain wave?
Matthew Crawley: Not very modern. They were invented by Thomas Jefferson.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Why does every day involve a fight with an American?
Matthew Crawley: I'll fetch you a different one.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: No, no, no, no, I'm a good sailor.
Lady Sybil Crawley: [to Gwen Dawson] We're not giving up. No one hits the bull's eye with the first arrow.
John Bates: [witnessing Thomas' callousness to William and Daisy, grabbing his collar, and pushing him against the wall in a threatening fashion] Now listen, you filthy little rat. If you don't lay off, I will punch your shining teeth through the back of your skull.
Thomas Barrow: [contemptuously] Is this supposed to frighten me, Mr. Bates? Because it is, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but it's just not working. It isn't working.
[He walks away from Bates]
Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham: [speaking of his former chauffeur] And to think Taylor's gone off to run a tea shop! I cannot feel it would make for a restful retirement, can you?
Charlie Carson: [hyperbolically] I would rather be put to death, My Lord.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: [to the collective] Where's Robert? He can't have been drinking port since we left, he'd be under the table by now.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Sybil - Sybil darling, why would you want to go to a real school? You're not a doctors daughter!
Lady Sybil Crawley: Nobody learns anything from a governess, apart from French and how to curtsy!
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Well, what else do you need?
Lady Sybil Crawley: Well, there's...
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: Are you thinking of a career in banking?
Cora Crawley, Countess of Grantham: Things are different in America.
Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham: I know. They live in wigwams.