Chon: You're already dead. You're dead from the moment you're born. If you can accept that, you can accept anything.
Chon: Adrenaline is natures way of telling you 'don't fuck up.'
O: That's how I imagined it went down, but the truth has an imagination of its own.
O: [voice-over] I looked up the definition of the word savage. It means cruel, crippled, regressed back to a primal state of being. One day, maybe, we'll be back. For now, we live like savages... beautiful, savages.
O: [voice-over] Just because I'm telling you this story doesn't mean I'm alive at the end of it. This could all be pre-recorded and I could be talking to you from the bottom of the ocean. Yeah, it's that kind of a story. Because things just got so out of control.
O: [voice-over, describing sex with Chon] I have orgasms. He has "wargasms."
Elena: I like talking to you Ophelia. But let me remind you that if I had to, I wouldn't have a problem cutting both their throats.
Chon: I think, basically, you want us to eat your shit and call it caviar.
Elena: Have you ever really thought about your future?
O: That's a little ironic, considering the situation I'm in.
Lado: [about O] So which cock does she suck?
Esteban: I can't tell. The white guys like each other. Maybe they're faggots.
Lado: Maybe she does them both.
O: [voice-over] It started here in paradise, Laguna Beach, where they say God parked himself on the seventh day, but they towed him on the eighth.
Chon: Grow up Ben. You don't change the world, it changes you.
Elena: If the mountain doesn't come to Mohammed, Mohammed comes to California.
Ben: That was Mexico, this is Laguna. The cops wear shorts and ride bicycles.
O: [voice-over] Call me O. I was named after Ophelia, the bipolar basket case in Hamlet who committed suicide. So I cut it down to just O.
Elena: May I ask you how long have you been using, Ophelia?
O: Since the eighth grade.
Elena: And you're wondering why you're having concentration problems?
Lado: You think you left the old ways behind? Well, let me tell you something. Tijuana is coming here. It's chasing us.
Chon: Close your legs. It's showing.
O: [uncrossing her ankles and putting her knees together] Oh. Sorry...
Chon: [about Ben] I was talking to him.
Elena: They must be taught respect. I found their weakness.
Lado: [via a Skype video and email to Ben and Chon] These guys were stupid. Be smarter. Don't make us go live! ::frowning-face emoticon:: We need to talk. Time and place coming...!