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*** This review may contain spoilers ***
It sucks that they had to put up a poster of this movie with Duke (Channing Tatum) and Joe (Bruce Willis) so grossly misleading when Duke showed up about what 10 mins or so then dies and Joe shows up when half of the movie is already finished, and not getting much burn at that (I should have known, how many of Willis's recent movies has been like this already). For an average movie goer like me (i'd like to think of myself like that) that doesn't normally go researching(goggling stuff) before watching a movie, I was sucked up by the poster itself expecting a whole lot of Duke and Joe in action. In my opinion, The Rock is not a bad actor himself but sadly he is not able to carry the movie by himself. I believe the movie producers/marketers or whoever is responsible for creating that misleading poster cheated people for their money. To be honest I am not sure I would be going to watch the movie in theater had I known I would be only getting this much, It's one of the movies I could have waited to be available on HBO\TV or on DVD. I did like the special effects though, especially the mountain action scenes.
As a film buff, I love seeing films alone on Saturday afternoons or Friday nights. As as result of my frequent attendance, I have come to know not to expect much from action blockbuster films. Yes, you get your usual incomprehensible hand-to-hand fights, buildings exploding and enemy gunfire as inaccurate as ever, with the inevitably minimal plot and screenplay. As the ending credits rolled, I stood up thinking "ehhh". The film definitely had some amazingly entertaining action sequences and awesome special effects, but you know, you can't really be THAT amazed with an action film. Not gonna lie, the screenplay in this film was pretty well written, and it included quite a few pleasantly surprising laughs. Dwayne Johnson has a big few months ahead of him with the release of Snitch (which I give a 7/10), the next Fast and Furious movie, and Pain & Gain. With this film, he did reinforce his true acting credentials, even though not much notable acting is observed in such a genre. All in all, if you're expecting something like Olympus Has Fallen, you might be dissatisfied. If you go in like me, with no true expectations other than hoping for some entertainment, you might like what you see.
It's amazing how many good movies produced this year have been
relegated to sub-par status, while others that shouldn't be given a
glance are given zenith status as great pieces of work, art, and other
such pop-cultural sub- standard excrescences achieve more than their
worth in fool's gold. One such picture - I'm sorry - movie, that
audiences will endure a release of, either glorifyingly, or harshly, is
G.I. Joe: Retaliation, the new brawn packed action farce from Paramount
Starring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, and with appearances by Bruce Willis and Channing Tatum, the film offers no social commentary, consists of nothing remotely engaging (I tended to doze off on even the action scenes), and pities itself with egregious CGI 3-D effects that disappear mid-air depending on where one sits in the audience. There is no basis for being an audience member, because the effects are so jarring, that the viewer will not be able to involve itself to anything worth sitting for an hour and forty minutes for (which trust me, there wouldn't be anyway.) But that's not the half of the film's problems.
The real problem stems from lack of plot. More like no plot. The film is supposed to be a sequel, or rather, a continuation of the original G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra, but even by todays standards, the filmmakers weren't trying to mark any new ground. All we get is one action sequence after another. Even James Cameron knows you need a through-line of plot device to make these kinds of movies work, but director Jon M. Chu doesn't have enough respect for the audience to even give them that. Instead, we are mindlessly treated to fast shots of punches being thrown, with no idea who is throwing them, why, or if we should care.
Seriously. We only know one thing. The good guys will always win. Never a good sign when you go to the movies to know how they end, with no conscious minding of what it will take to get there. Don't waste your money, my friends. Still, more muscular contractions ache this bastard of a performer.
Those involved knew this was just a paycheck - examine the evidence; Dennis Quaid did not return, and subsequently they need Bruce Willis to carry the big name legacy. Channing Tatum has his screen time terminally reduced, not a great sign because most audiences will probably be wanting to see the film solely for his performance. The writer was clearly hired to write a how-to on perfecting scripts for CGI based stories. This wouldn't be such an insult to film purists and enthusiasts alike if it wasn't such a dreary waste of time and money. There is nothing there in terms of story or structure. The movie starts, and it's action scenes strung together with no link. Then you leave. I would disclose such a plot to entice what viewers may challenge the notion of wasting their money if such a plot existed! It's a disgusting practice of show-off acrobatics by computer geniuses that would be better suited decrypting or ciphering codes left behind from the Zodiac Killer or the Unabomber! This is not why we go to the movies. We go to be entertained, and I predict that many an audience member be robbed of their hard earned cash in this recession, and by such standards and caused an equal recession in film quality! Honestly, there has to be a better place for films in today being tomorrow's history, than this!
An early release for such a seemingly summer blockbuster - it's obvious Paramount wants to get this one out of the way, so they don't have to worry about a summer release tanking to the bottom of the swimming pool (a place where the pre-teens normally disposed to this mendicant tar would be better off spending the day.) It's futile to promote a product without any real integrity, or so I thought. Amazing what a little muscle can do. It's already seen some couple million smackers (across the face!) for it's previews and advance releases, but when it all comes down, G.I. Joe: Retaliation is one hunk of movie that holds a strong PR campaign in it's biceps, but can't think for itself, and never latches on to the timeless fact that the real strength of a movie lies in it's story and it's characters, both factors of the machine that are simultaneously weak.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Not to give too much away but the story is weak and can be summed up
with this equation:
4 GI Joes - 3 ninjas = 1 movie you wish you'd never seen!!!
My wife and I sat and waited for action, and waited, them waited some more... It finally came like my brother melting my Duke action figure with a lighter and Aqua-Net. Horrible plot, good special effects, and a stereo-typical ending. The next DirecTV add will say cable is worse than... Sitting thru GI Joe 2.
If you don't believe me, waste your money, then contact me for an "I told you so!"
G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra feels like it belongs to a different age of
blockbusters. It had a hard time fitting in to the modern generation
thus most moviegoers never find it as appealing as the other films that
was released on that year. Those rants can be true only in some
reasons. The film is undeniably silly and dumb but it was never boring
and has its own quality. Since people are now asking for darker and
much serious blockbusters, this sequel reduces all the silliness that
was displayed on the original. G.I. Joe: Retaliation is cooler and less
cartoony. Unfortunately, it is also less exciting and terribly
uninspired. The action may be better looking but the lack of fortitude
and creativity made it fall short into another visual showcase stress.
"Awesome" is the main goal of this sequel. While the original was too corny to impress, this film darkens the tone and made it a bit down to earth. It abandons the silly gadgets and the ridiculous laws of physics that was shown in the original. But the film fails to be both dark and realistic. Not only because of those robotic fireflies and the mass annihilating missiles but the secret prisons and the government are unbelievably dumb to manage their job. Well, it's a blockbuster based on toys so it will never be too realistic. Deal with it while we are here for the fun. The dark aspects aren't dark at all. What they only do is to be serious. This seriousness blocks the potential joy and turns it into standard blockbuster bland.
The storytelling is quite messy. It's like an uninteresting version of Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol with uninteresting characters. The storytelling from the first movie wasn't great either since it is cluttered with cheesy flashbacks. But it's worse here because it takes some twists that are absurdly incoherent. And so, it's all pretentious. The characters are boring and even the performances can't bring them to life. Dwayne Johnson is the only good thing among them though, Bruce Willis is trying to make fun of himself again as a crazy grandaddy, and the villains ham it up which isn't suppose to be a bad thing but they can't give enough personality to them.
The action scenes are acceptable enough to call awesome at least. With all the explosions and the none CGI-ed machines, it seems to be really exciting, but it's not. It does a fine job to be pretty but there's a difference between good looking and exciting. There's only a little suspense. If there is actually suspense and joy then it would be found at the mountain ninja fight but it's just mild and still glosses some slow motions in it. For the rest of the action, the heroes are always superior. Plus more explosions and slow-mos. The action is stylishly directed anyway. The fight between Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow remains to be the only action that excites and one part of the climax has a nutty scene with The Rock riding huge vehicles and shooting like a badass. The production designs, special effects, and costumes gets better. What else to talk about it?
The absence of the Joes' ridiculous transportation and weapons, holograms, and other snazzy gadgets may please our modern viewers but it also forgets why this material is interesting anyway. Now we only get typical military stuff. It still has some crazy devices but it's limited compare to the first film. Rise of Cobra wasn't a classic. It's nothing more than a simple guilty pleasure. Same with Retaliation except this one can't even be completely pleasurable unless you want some endless visual coolness. Cool is not a bad thing but it could have been creative and much more exciting instead of showing off slow-mos on screen. To be fair, it's mildly entertaining and good to look at. If the film wasn't this visually awesome, it would have been an empty cinema. The series still fails to justify its source material.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
I had 50/50 hopes for this movie and felt a bit bummed out when it was
told that it will be delayed to March 2013 but I thought maybe it was
for the best so I decided to give it chance. Now after nearly a year of
waiting, I have to say I was a bit disappointed
First off, they promised to explain what happened to the characters in the previous film that didn't show up (ripcord, Scarlett etc.) but no explanation was given whatsoever as well as wanting to strengthen Duke and Baroness character but nothing was ever explained. 2nd storywise, it was not that very interesting in my opinion and there some parts which I find a bit illogic and not explained like how did Storm Shadow survive. The guy just like appeared out of no where
Character wise, Cobra rules compared to the Joes. Lady Jaye and Flint were not really that interesting to watch and the romance between them didn't really look that convincing. Killing off Duke Hauser (Channing Tatum)and letting Roadblock (The Rock) take over as team leader for me was the biggest letdown in my opinion since he never really looked that great playing the lead role. Bruce Willis was OK a Joe but nothing exciting but for me the best Joe out there would have to be Snake Eyes (Ray Park). His performances were great as usual and really made the movie looked exciting
As for the villains, I really wanted to see Zartan fight with somebody but that didn't happen. Destro was the biggest disappointment for me since they killed his character off just like that. Cobra Commander looked better in this outfit that the previous one but there was really nothing from him but in my opinion, the best villain and character of the entire movie has got to go to Firefly (Ray Stevenson) His character was so wicked cool and I really loved how those nano flys were used as his explosion device. Though a villain, he stood out the most in the film for me I can't say much for the rest of the cast like Storm Shadow and Jinx since there wasn't really anything much from them
However I find it kind of hard to believe that this is a G.I Joe movie since apart from Snake Eyes, there wasn't really anything that made me feel that these guys were the G.I Joes since it felt like there were very little connection between this team to the previous G.I Joe team in the first movie
Overall a bit of a letdown compared to the first movie and it didn't seemed like it was a sequel to the first G.I Joe movie and it wasn't really worth watching it in 3D either
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
After 2009, surprisingly well done Rise of Cobra, I was expecting an
entertain sequel anticipating how the writers and director would tie in
Zartan as President. It seems the studio decided to reboot the
franchise by decided to continue parts of the previous storyline which
fails horribly. The movie ends up being a mashed up, thrown together
movie with little continuation of the previous storyline and muscular
actors whose roles are just being muscular people with guns. The movies
basic premise is around nuclear disarmament. With the GI Joe's forced
to rebuild and discover the plan of Cobra before they destroy the
The only good part of the movie is the opening where The Rock and Channing Tatum display the only enjoyable on screen chemistry of any of the actors. Unfortunately, that chemistry is blown up roughly 15 minutes in when Tatum's character is blown up. When Tatum is killed The Rock's character is upset for about two minutes. Stranded in a desert, The Rock, Lady Jaye and Flint somehow manage to make it back to America. Though how is unknown. To avoid being found, the trio hide in an abandon rec centre where they find weights and old computers from over a decade ago. Yet 5 minutes later is all upgraded to state of the art technology, in which lady Jaye is able to find videos of the present discover his commonly used phrases and hand position before and after Zartan has become President. Yes all this on 1995 technology that magically upgrades and takes her a matter of hours. Now the side plot which is equally as awful. Stormshadow who appeared to be dead at the end of the first movie somehow is alive. Stormshadow breaks Cobra commander out of prison leaving destro. But is badly burn during his escape. To recover from his burns, Stormshadow travels to the mountains where he is revived. SnakeEyes and his protégé climb the mountain drug Stormshadow to return him to the place of their training as seen in the first movie. As in the first movie they are trying Stormshadow for murdering the master. Stormshadow then proves to the council he is not guilty as it was not his sword. Back video shows it was Zartan in disgust. Stormshadow joins the Joes in fight against Cobra. Need I say more the plot is illogical leaving anyone who saw the first movie scratching their heads. Flint and Lady Jaye prove to be nothing more than eye candy for the viewer as they have very little back story and don't advance the previous story. The films ending action sequence is rushed and poorly planned out. The scene boils down to the Joes showing up little planning and no story on where the building is there are attacking. Yet kill everyone but Cobra commander and save the day.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
With Channing, Dwayne,Lee, Bruce and most importantly Palicki in this
one, you'd expect real fast-paced action with great visuals. On the
latter, it delivers as the visuals are great and one of the best of the
recent. On the prior, not so much as the storyline drags unnecessarily
around the US Prez. Palicki brings in the much needed eye-candy for the
hardcore action fans though only in glimpses while Channing, being the
chick-magnet gets one big anxious sigh from the ladies in the first
half of the movie. Dwayne does what Dwayne does - kicks ass! Cotrona,
however looks like he's done this one for free as he hardly has much to
do and beats me why he's even there. Snake eyes, Jinx, Zartan & Firefly
entertain as characters with purpose. RZA is a big LOL.
There's muscle,hard-hitting physical combat action, sensuality, technology, star-appeal and pretty interesting automobiles. All you need if you're an action fan. Now if only they could somehow mysteriously put in an interesting and not-so-predictable storyline, then we'd have a real blockbuster hit worth your ticket money!
G.I. Joe Retaliation is an strictly average action movie.
The movie has the same repeated story,which we have often seen in many action movies before.
For me,what made G.I Joe Retaliation more disappointing is Bruce Willis.He had hardly any screen-space to showcase his action skills.
G.I Joe Retaliation is a movie made for the teens.The teens are surely going to love this one! There are many action sequences in this movie,but only a few stand out.The action sequence in the Himalayas is the highlight of the movie.This action sequence has been shot very nicely.
The direction is mediocre.
Performance: Dwayne Johnson is fine.Channing Tatum is strictly okay.Elodie Yung,Ray Park and Adrianne Palicki are just okay.Bruce Willis disappoints.
All in all,G.I.Joe Retaliation is a strictly average action movie.I would recommend this flick for the teens but not for adults.I am giving it a four on ten.
I was absolutely disgusted with this film. It wasn't particularly
offensive to any particular group (although the film's depiction of
Muslims in one scene and the fact that every Asian character in the
movie is a Ninja will likely raise a few eyebrows) so much as it was to
its audience. The film expects the audience to believe outlandish
scenes so long as there are explosions. The film is "short"(although it
feels long) but even with the film's length about 1/2 of the scenes are
utterly pointless. The opening scene involves some event in a North
Korean factory...that event is never mentioned again.
The acting in this film was dreadful. Every actor appears to be sleeping their way through the film waiting for their next paycheck. I've seen better acting in Super Bowl advertisements than I have in this film. Granted, none of these actors are particularly talented in the first place, but this movie makes them look even worse than before. It is also painful to watch Bruce Willis lose another shred of his dignity, which is now lesser than his hair.
Even the special effects were sub-par. There are a few decent explosions, but one scene in particular involving ninjas on a mountain top looks more like a video game than a feature film. The problem with the action scenes in this movie is that we don't care about the characters; they're all identical in terms of personality. If I don't care about your character, I don't care if your character lives or dies or how your character lives or dies. And if the actors don't even care, I certainly don't care.
Overall, if you want a "popcorn flick," you can find something far better than this.
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