Bob scores a temporary gig as a cook at an "underdog" frat house and discovers that he fits right in! Hijinks ensue as Bob and the rest of the fraternity brothers find themselves in the middle of a collegiate prank war that involves the house's most famous alumnus, Dr. Yap. Meanwhile, the kids are on a mission to invade the frat house and get in on the action.
Determined to have a perfect Thanksgiving, Bob meticulously prepares the family turkey. But, to his horror, he finds that someone then dumps the turkey in the toilet in an act of Thanksgiving sabotage.
In an attempt to redeem a failed talent show performance from her past, Linda reunites with her former band mates from, the Ta-Ta's, to perform at their high school reunion. At the event, a former female classmate attempts to impress Bob, her high school crush, who, in turn, becomes very self-conscious about the unwanted attention.
To Tina's delight, Bob becomes the substitute "Home Ec" teacher at her school and ends up creating a full-scale restaurant in the classroom. However, her excitement is short-lived as Bob's position causes father/daughter friction. But when Gene and Louise go to work for Bob's "school" restaurant, Linda must fend for herself at the family's "other" restaurant (aka Bob's Burgers).
After Linda accidentally kills the family tree, the Belchers must go out on Christmas Eve to find a new one. But when Bob cuts off a giant candy cane truck, they are forced to outrun the madman driver (homage to the 1971 movie "The Duel") and spend the entire night together in the car. Back at the Belcher home, Bob's friend, Teddy, accidentally gets stuck in the kids' Santa trap.
Linda decides to invite some of Louise's classmates over for a slumber party without her knowledge. With the prospect of being forced to endure an entire night with people she hates, Louise devises a plan to get all the girls to beg to go home. With the help of Tina and Gene, she starts to try and scare them off, but one is reluctant to go.
To compete with fellow "restaurateur," Jimmy Pesto, and his blowout Super Bowl event, Bob is determined to create a Bob's Burgers commercial to air during the "big game." In an effort to outshine Pesto, the Belchers recruit Randy, a documentarian, to assist with the filmmaking and hire on former pro football star Connie Frye to be the celebrity endorser.
Bob and Linda ask Teddy to babysit the kids while they're on a romantic getaway at a Burger Convention. In the process, Teddy earns the title "Uncle Teddy" when he puts Tina's crush in his place for using her to get free burgers.
Bob, Linda, and the kids board a train for a wine tasting while the kids are put in the caboose. The kids sneak out in an attempt to steal the chocolate from the kitchen car while Bob challenges another person on the train to a contest.
In an homage to the "Bronies" subculture, Tina attends her first Equestra-con, a convention based on her favorite animated pony show, "The Equestranauts." To her surprise, she finds that the show's fans are middle-aged men (called "Equesticles"). When a powerful super-fan tricks Tina out of her rare toy pony, it's up to Bob to go undercover to get it back.
Gene, Louise, and Tina discover a seaweed-covered object at the beach that turns out to be a large hunk of Ambergris - an extremely valuable, but illegal, by-product of whale poop that is used in high-end perfumes. But Louise tries to cheat Gene and Tina out of the profit she hopes to make by selling the treasure on the black market. Meanwhile, Bob and Linda deal with their psychologically unstable landlord who is building them a new bathroom.
Upon learning that she has a cavity and needs a filling, Louise runs away from the dentist's office and seeks refuge at Aunt Gail's. When Louise refuses to go home, Linda sends Tina and Gene to join her and bets her that she won't last the weekend with Aunt Gail's "craziness."
Motivated by the promise of a new beachside burger joint, Bob conspires with Felix to convince Mr. Fischoeder to sell Wonder Wharf. Meanwhile, Tina protests the destruction of the wharf's carousel by chaining herself to it.