Iron Man: Ah, scanners are clear, weathers great, everything's quiet, guess that means something awful's gonna happen, huh?
Black Widow: [thinking] You have no idea. Hm!
Mystique: [as Iron Man] For the record, I love Italian food.
Iron Man: Too bad. All you're going to get is jailhouse spaghetti.
Captain America: She checks out. Natasha Romanoff aka The Black Widow. Freelance agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. We've worked with her before.
Iron Man: Welcome aboard. Russian, huh?
Black Widow: Yes, darling.
Iron Man: Can you do me a favor and say "moose and squirrel"?
Black Widow: No.
Hulk: [notices Thor, Falcon and Iron Man looking romantically at Black Widow] Hey, why everybody looking at girl like that?
Silver Surfer: My comrades behave like they've never seen a female of their species.
Black Widow: I'm used to it, darling. Happens all the time. I suppose it is something like, how you say, my super power.
Dr. Doom: Report!
Black Widow: I have soo much chocolate candy, darling. Do you think eat the caramel or devour the coconut?
Dr. Doom: What kind of nonsense question is this? The caramel of course. Coconuts displeases me.
Black Widow: Everything is going according to plan, they suspect nothing.
Dr. Doom: Well why should they? You are an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D., they have no idea the earlier battle was a ruse staged to fool them into trusting you. Ugh, I despise having to talk to do-gooder heroes!
[Black Widow morphs into Mystique]
Dr. Doom: Much better, Mystique. Now go and gather information, report what you find, and do not fail me.
Mystique: You don't have to order me around!
[Mystique morphs back into Black Widow]
Black Widow: The pleasure is all mine, darling.
M.O.D.O.K.: [to Screaming Mimi] You know, Screaming - can I call you Screaming? I heard from a friend of a friend of a cousin of a friend that Iron Man once said your voice reminds him of fingernails on a chalkboard over a loudspeaker during a train wreck. Iron Man said that, can you believe it?
Iron Man: I couldn't help but notice that you have a mouth. Do you like Italian food? Cause I know a place... a romantic table, you, me, no beavers?
Black Widow: Ugh!
Wolverine: Let me tell you a secret, kid.
Falcon: [actually Mystique in disguise] Secret? Yes, tell me, what's the secret?
Wolverine: Never fall for the pretty super hero.
[snikts one claw]
Wolverine: Super heroes...
[snikts the second]
Wolverine: super villains...
[snikts the third]
Wolverine: and back up dancers. In that order.
Captain America: Golly gee, microwaves are truly a modern miracle.
Iron Man: Whoo, finally. Last checkpoint. All the fractals are here. Eh, Black Widow, you stand guard, I'll make the deposit.
Black Widow: Nothing will go wrong on my watch.
[laughs sinisterly as Iron Man moves into the vault]
Mystique: And by nothing, I mean everything.
[shifts into Captain America's shape]
Captain America: [repelling Screaming Mimi's voice with his mighty shield] Ah, for apple pie!
M.O.D.O.K.: Klaw! Turn the star spangled one's brains into sonic sauerkraut. Hey, no offence.