Natalie Teeger: [examining a painting] Could be a lover?
Adrian Monk: How do you figure?
Natalie Teeger: Well, he's naked, and, uh... lower right corner?
Adrian Monk: Oh. Oh! Oh, I thought that was the signature.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: [talking to a search party] Thank you all once again for coming. You know the situation. We're looking for a woman. Her name is Amanda Castle.
Lt. Randall Disher: Although any dead body would be of interest to us.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Thank you, Randy.
Adrian Monk: [about Shelby] This dog is really, really smart. I've been teaching her tricks.
Lt. Randall Disher: Like?
Adrian Monk: Oh, like not to lick me, not to drool, not to roll over, not to, you know, discharge anything.
Anne Marie: Are you my uncle?
Adrian Monk: No. No.
Anne Marie: Didn't think so.
Adrian Monk: No, I'm your Aunt Natalie's boss.
Anne Marie: Do you know her other boss, the crazy one?
Adrian Monk: Yes. Yes, I-I-I-I think I have met him once or twice.
Lt. Randall Disher: Now he's afraid that she'll identify him.
Adrian Monk: How?
Lt. Randall Disher: She could bark at him.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Randy, as far as I know, in the State of California, dogs are not allowed to testify in open court.
Lt. Randall Disher: Maybe DeWitt's afraid they'll change the rule.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: Change the rule against dogs testifying in court?
Lt. Randall Disher: I don't know, one of those referendums. It is California.
Captain Leland Stottlemeyer: You want to know how tired I am? I'm so tired I don't even know if that makes sense.