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"NCIS" The Inside Man (TV Episode 2009) Poster

(TV Series)

(2009)

Quotes

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Hey Boss, you ever fail your polygraph?

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Nope. Never took one.

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Abby Sciuto: I only take orders from one person: Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs. Unless he asks me to do it, it doesn't get done!

Metro Detective Danny Sportelli: I think that's going to change, honey.

Abby Sciuto: [Gibbs enters. Abbey rushes to him] Gibbs! Make this awful man go away.

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NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Boss, I better go down, reschedule this polygraph test.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Don't bother, McGee. Nothing wrong with the first one.

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: What do you mean?

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I think you made an impression on the examiner.

[McGee looks confused]

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I think she made an excuse to see you again.

[McGee still looks confused]

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: You want me to draw you a picture?

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: [McGee understands] No. I'm going to handle her boss.

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NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: How you doing? Special Agent Gibbs and DiNozzo. Sit down.

Benjamin Franklin: Thank you. Benjamin Franklin, Securities and Exchange Commission. I know, I don't look like an SEC investigator.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Is that really your name?

Benjamin Franklin: Yes, and I've heard every imaginable joke. So, spare me?

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NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Why do I get the feeling that Gibbs and Sportelli are going to come to blows.

Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: Who is Sportelli?

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: He's the police detective who made the mistake of tugging on Superman's cape.

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NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: [Watching Gibbs in interrogation] So what do you think? How's he going to break her down? What's the style?

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: He's leading with Creepy Uncle, but I think he's gonna go with Father Figure you can trust.

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Nope. Just doesn't feel right. I am going to go with the classic in your face Gibbs the Intimidator.

Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: Don't think so.

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: No.

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Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: [Ziva hands Gibbs some papers] I need your signature on this. I want to be an NCIS Agent.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: I don't even know if that's possible. You would have to resign from Mossad.

Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: Already have. Sent my father an email.

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: What's he think about that?

Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: Does not matter.

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Ziva David, Former Mossad Liaison: [after listening to a Beltway Burns clip which is an outright lie] That is total salami!

NCIS Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo: Baloney.

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Metro Detective Danny Sportelli: I have to maintain the integrity of this crime scene, Gibbs. I expect your co-operation. That includes investigating the possibility of an NCIS cover up.

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Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: You know, I'd like to have a chat with the people who wrote these instructional manuals. But I don't believe we have a language in common.

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NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Have you ever heard of an agent having to retake their test?

Abby Sciuto: [Abby sighs] Special Agent Krischner.

NCIS Special Agent Timothy McGee: Kirschner?

Abby Sciuto: Yeah. He was gone before you got here. He was, um, he was let go.

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Dr. Donald 'Ducky' Mallard: It never made sense to me, to spend a fortune on something that's going to be viewed for a couple hours then stuck in the ground to rot.

Abby Sciuto: Mine has, and will continue to provide me with hours of restful sleep and pleasure.

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Abby Sciuto: [DiNozzo and McGee enter the lab] You're out!

[to Gibbs]

Abby Sciuto: Did you know?

NCIS Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Director handled it. Way above my paygrade. Don't get too comfortable boy. We've got a search team to organize.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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