Jason Stackhouse: I love the smell of nail polish in the morning!
Jason Stackhouse: It's like if a tree falls in the woods, it's still a tree, ain't it?
Maryann Forrester: [as Sookie is hauled into the living room] Just in time.
Sookie Stackhouse: What the hell are you doing in my grandmother's wedding dress?
Maryann Forrester: [happily] Welcome, Sookie. You're going to be my maid of honor.
Sookie Stackhouse: You have no right to wear that dress!
Maryann Forrester: I know I should have asked you, but I couldn't find you. You'll probably never use it anyway.
Sookie Stackhouse: Oh, go to hell!
Maryann Forrester: Please don't be so negative. It is my day.
Sookie Stackhouse: And you're in my house and those are my friends!
Sookie Stackhouse: [to Maryann] I don't know how you did what you've done to them, but I will not let this happen!
Maryann Forrester: [after everyone has left] I'm all yours. Give it your best.
Sookie Stackhouse: My best what?
Maryann Forrester: The electricity. Do it again.
Sookie Stackhouse: I can't. It's never happened to me before. I don't even know what it was.
Maryann Forrester: [happily] I've never felt anything like it. It was like nature herself was shooting out from your fingertips.
Maryann Forrester: [after Sookie tries to replicate the power and smacks Maryann] That's hitting me. You're not committing to this at all.
Sookie Stackhouse: I do not have electrical powers. I am a human being!
Maryann Forrester: You keep saying that, but if you were human...
[vibrating and stopping]
Maryann Forrester: I would've taken you over by now. Come on, it'll be our little secret. What are you?
Sookie Stackhouse: I'm a waitress. What the fuck are you?
Maxine Fortenberry: [tranced] What would it do you to keep your own mother locked up in her own house. Norman Bates!
Hoyt Fortenberry: You know I'm going to take everything you've said for the last two days, about me, about daddy and I'm gonna lock it up in a little box and I'm gonna forget it ever happened.
Maxine Fortenberry: [growling] This is bigger than your petty little feelings. A god is coming into our midst. Does any part of your puny brain understand what that means?
Hoyt Fortenberry: We're stayin' home!
Maryann Forrester: Think back. Wasn't there a time when you felt someone or something watching over you?
Sookie Stackhouse: Yes. God.
Maryann Forrester: [snickering] Well, you can call it that. But it's not the same one the blind billions worship and in your heart of hearts, you know it.
Sookie Stackhouse: Fine then. What am I?
Maryann Forrester: You're definitely beyond human. I live off human energy and your I can't channel. That's very rare, though surprisingly not unique in this town.
Sookie Stackhouse: [trying to understand] Sam. You're marrying Sam?
Maryann Forrester: Please. My husband is a god. Sam is-is just the ideal wedding gift... oh, it's been such a long wait.
Maryann Forrester: I'm sorry. I'm getting a little over excited. I'll smear everything.
Sookie Stackhouse: How do you know he's coming tonight?
Maryann Forrester: Oh, no time has ever been more perfect. I'm know my special sacrifice is on his way.
Sookie Stackhouse: He's done nothing to you!
Maryann Forrester: He is the vessel. He appeared to me naked. A virgin drawn to the very statue that represents the birth of my god. 'Should have sacrificed him than and there. But I foolishly let him get away.
Sookie Stackhouse: By sacrifice, does that involve cutting out his heart?
Maryann Forrester: It's the food of the gods. My husband will love it. It's the very thing that gives him life.
Sookie Stackhouse: You'll never get Sam. He's gonna escape you.
Eric Northman: [playing yahtzee] How long does this game go on for?
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: We play to five million.
Hadley Hale: [whining] She's way ahead.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: It's pure luck. Yahtzee is the most egalitarian game in the world. You could be my social, physical or intellectual inferior, but your chances are equal to mine. It's the perfect antidote for this world, where things of inferiority and superiority do matter.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: [upset at Eric] You may be the strongest, oldest vampire in my queendom, but if I wanted I could own your fangs as earrings!
Bill Compton: You've heard there's a maenad in our midst?
Sam Merlotte: I'm familiar.
Bill Compton: You are aware she is here because of you.
Sam Merlotte: Something like that.
Bill Compton: I need you and Sookie needs you to make this right.
Sam Merlotte: If I thought it was as easy as givin' myself up to Maryann, I'd have done that by now, and what's to say she's gonna stop at me? Killers just don't suddenly quit killin'. You oughta know that.
Bill Compton: And standing by idly is not an option either. You must come with me.
Sam Merlotte: Oh, I'm not sure I wanna be doing that.
Bill Compton: I'm not sure I'm giving you a choice.
Bill Compton: I wanted to thank you for trusting me with your life. It couldn't have been easy.
Sam Merlotte: Sookie's safe. You got what you wanted.
Bill Compton: You wanted it too.
Sam Merlotte: Well, she's family, but they all are. If there was a way to save 'em, I'm not gonna say 'no'.
Bill Compton: I am grateful you would reveal your gift for the sake of the town.
Sam Merlotte: It took me this long to realize you suffer a lot longer hidin' something than if you face up to it.
Eggs: [washing his hands] Where's Maryann? She's gotta know what happened.
Tara Thornton: We're okay. That's all that matters.
Eggs: [scoffing] Blood on my hands is not okay, Tara!
Tara Thornton: Sookie helped me remember some of the things I lost and I wish I could forget it again. Trust me, there's things you don't wanna know.
Eggs: Well, how do you know I don't wanna know 'em?
Tara Thornton: All that stuff's in the past. Why dwell on it? Can't was just start fresh?
Tara Thornton: I'm so sorry for bringin' all this craziness into your house. I got cuked in 'cause she made me feel like I was part of a family or something.
Sookie Stackhouse: Hey, you have a family. We're family.
Coby Fowler: Mamma, when you were away for all that time, you didn't see Rene?
Arlene Fowler: Oh no. I think he's still on his vacation. Eat, eat.
Lisa Fowler: [to Coby] Yep. I'm pretty sure he's dead.
Sue Ann Merlotte: We never thought we'd see you again.
Sam Merlotte: Well, never say never when there's the Internet.
Sue Ann Merlotte: Sam, if you came for an explanation, um I don't have a good one. Mitchell and I were down to our last nickle and we were scared. We still don't know what we saw that night.
Sam Merlotte: You saw me turn into a dog. So apparently that was worth abandoning me over. I spent the next nineteen years making sure nobody knew what I really was. That's what you left me with.
Sue Ann Merlotte: [crying] I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. We never meant to hurt you.
Bill Compton: [to Sookie] I love nothing more than to see you happy. It's really quite selfish.
Sookie Stackhouse: [finishing her dessert] It's a good thing you don't eat, 'cause I wouldn't share it with anyone. I think of a better way to top off the best meal of my life.
Bill Compton: I do have one last thing.
[hands her an envelope]
Sookie Stackhouse: [opening it] Plane tickets?... Where's Burlington?
Bill Compton: It's in Vermont.
Sookie Stackhouse: Why would we...
Bill Compton: Here's the other part.
[takes out a jewel box and pushes it to her hands. She opens it to find a diamond ring]
Bill Compton: Ms. Stackhouse, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife? That is assuming last night did not scare you off weddings for good.
[as she says nothing]
Bill Compton: Sookie, say something.
Sookie Stackhouse: [tearing up] I've dreamed of this since I was a little girl... In my dreams I always say 'yes'.
Bill Compton: Than it ought to be easy.
Sookie Stackhouse: Then why can't I say it? My heart's flying around in my chest. I can't even think straight. My life's inside out. With all that's happened I'm not sure about anything. I don't even know if I'm human!
Bill Compton: What?
Sookie Stackhouse: Maybe I am some kind of freak. I've only met one other person in the world like me and who even knows where he is? And what happens when I grow old and weak and you're still the same, what then?
Bill Compton: Sookie, I don't care about any of that. I want you just as you are.
Sookie Stackhouse: But I'm not even sure what I am!
Bill Compton: Are you saying no?
Sookie Stackhouse: No, I'm saying... I don't know what I'm saying. I need a minute to clean myself up. I'm sorry.
[leaves the table]
Sheriff Bud Dearborne: Come by the station in the morning and I'll give you your badge back.
Detective Andy Bellefleur: Really? I won't let you down, Bud. And I am never touching another drink again.
Sheriff Bud Dearborne: This town's a hell of a mess and I'm man enough to know I can't shoulder it myself... You might have your faults, Andy, but at least you got pants on.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: You know there's a maenad in Renard parish.
Eric Northman: Yes. That is the reason I came to see you, your majesty.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: I wouldn't get involved if I were you. Stick to what you're good at. I gave William Compton a few bits of hand-me-down folklore that accumulated over the centuries. But who knows what's gospel or gorilla shit... You know, I think he's monogamous with his human.
Eric Northman: He is in love with her, yes.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: He is? Well, of course. He would be with her. You probably are too.
Eric Northman: [almost reluctant] I do not love humans.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: She's not entirely human. Have you tasted her?
Eric Northman: Sadly, no.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: Don't, ever. One vampire falling in love is bad enough.
Eric Northman: Yes. Bill Compton certainly has a knack for finding trouble.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: For instance, how does he know I'm having you sell vampire blood?
[when he says nothing]
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: Guards hear everything.
Eric Northman: Your majesty, I'm sorry. There's no way he could...
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: That is really bad.
Eric Northman: He does not know you are supplying it.
Sophie-Anne Leclerq: [jumping him] He better not! I'm holding you responsible.