Stella: Y'know, I saw this TV show: Rosie O'Donnell took a bunch of dykes on a cruise to Nova Scotia, then this flock of lesbians got married there.
Stella: That's what they call us when we're in a group; a gaggle of gays, a flock of lesbians. Like in nature.
Dot: Stella, are you proposing to me?
Waitress: You seemed... familiar.
Stella: You know, if that skirt was any shorter, you'd need another hair net.
Prentice: [pointing at the car radio] Who's this?
Stella: Who's this? Who is this?
Stella: k.d. lang. This is k.d. lang. Jesus Anne Heche Christ.
[At the Canadian border, a bag of Dotty's medicine is found]
Border Patrol: Whose drugs are these?
Stella: Not mine!
Border Patrol: Your name is Dorothy?
Prentice: On weekends.
Guillaume: You're giving these people my breakfast?
Cat: It's just eggs and sausage, Guillaume.
Guillaume: She already had my fucking sausage.
Stella: Well, now she needs a bigger one.
Stella: If you're ever lucky enough to have a perfect day, don't let go of it. Bank it. Paint a picture of it.