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Let's not pretend why you watched this movie. I defy ANYONE to show me a movie that can't be improved by a cute Japanese girl dressed in little more than her underwear, a feather boa, and cowboy hat...with katanas. Yeah, I'm pretty sure if they'd thrown a character like that into Citizen Kane I might just agree with all those people who say it's the best movie ever made (it's not). And if said Japanese girl is, let's just say "well built", then all the better. So how bad does a movie have to be that all of this eye candy can't even save it? I don't know, but the Onechanbara sequel figured it out.
I actually liked the first Onechanbara. The action was better, the lead girl was cuter, and the story wasn't complete nonsense (close, but not complete). The plot is basically watching the lead "actress" jiggle and fight her way through hoards of zombies. I know that sounds like epic fun, but it's just not in this case. When a buxom Asian girl killing zombies with samurai swords cannot hold my attention, something is very, very wrong. I also cannot underestimate how annoying the whole "blood spatter on the camera" gets in this movie. Use it once or twice for effect...that's fine. But, if memory serves, it happens in EVERY fight scene in this movie and usually more than once. The whole thing is just a mess that not even your (and my) rather juvenile male desire for ridiculous amounts of eye candy can make excuses for. On the other hand, there's a certain honesty to this. Let's face it, this is precisely what Hollywood would love to do with every female action heroine. They just don't have the balls. Oh well...after watching this I'm thinking it's possible that may be a good thing.
Ditch this nonsense. Unless you have a thing for disjointed, annoying, and useless Japanese cinema (which is totally possible). Then by all means, watch away.
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