Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters (2013) Poster


[to Mina and Ben, as they approach the witch's house]

Hansel: Whatever you do, don't eat the fuckin' candy.

Hansel: We learned a couple of things while we were trapped in that house. One, never walk in to a house made of candy. And two, if you're gonna kill a witch, set her ass on fire.

Gretel: The Curse of Hunger for Crawling Things. I fucking hate that one.

Hansel: When you see my signal, unleash hell.

Gretel: Wow, this is amazing. And, uh, weird.

Hansel: It's a little creepy.

Gretel: You really keep all this stuff?

Hansel: [trying to end the conversation] All right, well...

Ben: I just have SO many questions, do you mind?

Hansel: [still trying to end the conversation] You know, we have...

Gretel: Oh no, no no no, you go ahead.

[smirks as Hansel kicks her under the table]

Ben: All right, uh, okay, uh, how do you best kill a witch?

Gretel: [innocently] Hansel?

Hansel: [pauses to glare at Gretel] Uh, cutting off their heads tends to work... and ripping out their hearts... and skinning them is also nice...

Gretel: Yeah, but burning them is the best way, 'cause it's the only way to be safe.

Ben: Burning, yeah, of course!

Hansel: [muttering into his mug] Burn 'em all...

[Last Lines]

[Pointing gun at camera]

Gretel: I hate to break this to you, but this isn't gonna be an open casket.

Muriel: [picks up a missing child poster] I see you got my invitation.

Gretel: Say your name before my arrows rip out your throat.

Muriel: I go by many names. None of which you are worthy of pronouncing.

[Muriel grins as she slowly reveals her true self to Gretel]

Gretel: [whispers] Oh my God!

Hansel: Revenge doesn't change the past. It won't bring our parents back. But it sure as hell feels good.

[From Trailer]

Hansel: Me and my sister... we have a past. We almost died at the hands of a witch. But that past made us stronger. We'd gotten a taste of blood. Witch blood. And we haven't stopped since.

[Hansel's timer goes off]

Mina: Are you alright?

Hansel: Yeah. When I was a kid, a witch made me eat so much candy, I got sick. Something happened to me. I have to take this injection every few hours or else I die.

[Injects Himself]

[from trailer]

Hansel: Some people will say that not all witches are evil, that their powers could be used for good. I say burn them all!

Hansel: Who the fuck is Edward?

[First Lines]

Hansel and Gretel's Mother: Take them into the forest now.

See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

Contribute to This Page