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"Family Guy" Stew-Roids (TV Episode 2009) Poster

(TV Series)

(2009)

Quotes

Stewie Griffin: [singing] I got veins. They carry blood all over my baddy.

[He stops singing and turns to Brian]

Stewie Griffin: That's how John Mayer would say it. Baddy. I'm really into him right now. You'd better be okay with it!

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Lois Griffin: Now, honey, this won't hurt.

[Dabs Stewie with disinfectant]

Stewie Griffin: Ah, those lying bastards at Johnson and Johnson!

[Cut to sinister Johnson and Johnson HQ]

Scientist #1: We'll put "No more tears" on the bottle.

Scientist #2: But it does make you cry.

Scientist #1: I know. Whoo-ha-ha-ha.

Scientist #2: Whoo-ha-ha-ha.

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Lois Griffin: Peter, what exactly are you worried will happen because of this?

Peter Griffin: World War 5!

Lois Griffin: Peter, we've talked about this, there has to be a World War 3 and 4 first.

Peter Griffin: Oh, no, Lois. That's the beauty of World War 5. It's so intense it jumps right over World War 3 and 4.

Lois Griffin: But that's...

Peter Griffin: I have spoken!

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Gina: [to Connie about Chris] He smells like Fred Flintstone's ass.

[cut to Fred Flintstone]

Fred Flintstone: Hey! No one's asking you to smell it.

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Stranger at the Gym: Ah, your kid just needs a little help. Try some of this

[offers steroids]

Stranger at the Gym: .

Peter Griffin: Well, if there's anyone I can trust it's a stranger at the gym holding a dirty needle!

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[providing commentary on Joe grilling hamburgers]

Peter Griffin: Now pick that one up and put it down in the exact same spot.

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Jock #2: Hey, let's corner the nerds and get them to show us their junk!

Jock #3: Yeah, won't that be gay of them?

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Brian Griffin: [seeing the new buffed-up Stewie] Stewie, you look gross. You look like Lou Ferrigno's poop.

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Stewie Griffin: Uh-oh! Spa-doodie-ohs!

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Adam Sandler: This is my old bicycle that I've had from when I was ten.

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Adam Sandler: Sometimes the banana seat hurts my heinie.

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Adam Sandler: When I ring the bell, it makes my pants feel funny. Ring ring ring!

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[while applying lipstick as "Goodbye Horses" plays in the background]

Chris Griffin: Would you do me? I'd do me. I'd do me so hard.

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Scott: Hey Meg. Take that!

[Farts at her causing her to run while the others laugh]

Jock #2: That was awesome!

Jock #3: The joke's kind of on *us*, 'cause we're smellin' it!

Jock #2: Yeah!

[high fives Scott]

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Principal Shepherd: Connie, the person who humiliated you has himself been humiliated. By the rules of High School, you are now popular again.

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Stewie Griffin: And now, here's something we hope you really like.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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