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Kirk B.R. Woller
Big jaws looking out to bite something on the tentacles. Ouch!!
Proof positive of the oh so thin line between madness and genius, The Asylum bring us another shoddy movie that somehow manages to be ridiculously entertaining while also being severely incompetent on many levels.
The plot is pretty much summed up in the title. Two giant sea creatures are awoken from ice-trapped slumber and start to cause havoc while en route to an eventual aquatic face-off. Scientists (identified by wearing white coats and using beakers and stuff) are working around the clock to save the world from the devastation these bests could cause.
To single anyone out in this endeavour is pretty useless. Acting is laughable in places, competent in others. The script and direction are hilarious. Effects come close to being decent at times then revert back to simply below-average. The same shots are re-used time and again and some of the bigger set-pieces are, there's no other way to put this really, simply fumbled.
But this movie is not about standard rules we can rate movies by. Oh no, this movie is about just how preposterous things can get and just how hard you can laugh as, for example, a shark attacks a large aeroplane. Or a giant octopus cuddles up to an oil rig. It makes the original Godzilla look like a billion dollar work of art and there is no way that sane people should enjoy it in the slightest. So I'm not sure what that says about me.
See this if you like: Snakes On A Train, Shark Attack, Octopus.
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