Neil Grimsley (Tony Janning
) is a slacker gas-station attendant from Trenton, NJ. His girlfriend (Tara Perry
) has left him for his jerk of a brother (Derek Carter
), and he has received a notice of eviction from his apartment. Worst of all? He's never been able to beat "that old Nintendo game."
One night, Neil gets drunk and pops The Legend of Zelda into his NES. When he finds a fairy's pond, he asphyxiates himself and wakes up in a "spinning forest," completely naked. It soon dawns on him that he has been transported into the game's world, and he is stuck in the role of the hero Link who must rescue Princess Zelda (Angie Hill
) from the evil Lord Gannon (Scott Chernoff
Along his quest, Neil faces, among others, a foul-mouthed, marginally-helpful Old Man (and his twin brother Ooold Man, who has Tourette's) (both Mike Rose
); rock-throwing Octoroks; a sex-crazed, emotionally-unstable Fairy (Felicia Day
); a trio of gay, German skeletons; a vicious yet sentimental unicorn-dragon; a scamming storekeeper; elf-hating, booze-guzzling Moblins; mostly-invulnerable Dark Nuts; a duo of giant, recently-unfrozen Armos; ruthless, kings-of-the-dance-off Lynels; a barely-closeted, aspiring-comic, Gannon-abused Wizzrobe (Eric Acosta
); and of course, power- and fog-loving Gannon himself. And waiting for Neil at the end of it all is Princess Zelda herself.